Maddening Thoughts of a Rambling Gentleman

Happy New years, enjoy some DW E-cards

2011-01-01T01:27:00.000-08:00

The Soccor Match

2010-12-30T02:59:00.000-08:00

Wondering why I'm back to Who stuff??? Well the Christmas episode has sent me back to where I began... so, Enjoy!

The Field

Five is displeased that Cricket wasn't the game of choice

I don't think reversing the Polarity will work this time Doctor

The opposition falls over themselves as Eleven lines up the shot

Nine down on the job as Four stands by

Eleven lines up the shot

And it's good. Reaching never was Seven's strong suit.

Doctor Who Figure Party - Fishing Trip

2010-12-28T19:50:00.000-08:00

Here is a slide show from the trip and below are some stills:

Picture time

2010-12-27T17:37:00.000-08:00

Had a slight problem with my new Doctor Who figures... well... just watch:

Sub Par Gaming - Alone in the Dark 2008

2010-12-21T02:44:00.000-08:00

Another week another video, this time I turn on the lights in Alone in the Dark:

2 Minute Grab : Slacker Movies

2010-12-10T03:36:00.001-08:00

A 2 Minute Grab on my thoughts on the style of film known as the Slaker Movie.

Introductions - The Gamer

2010-12-03T21:55:00.001-08:00

Here is the promised introduction about what the hell is going on.

Next week, Sub-Par gaming reviews Alone in the Dark 2008

Review: Star Wars; The Force Unleashed II

2010-11-23T12:09:00.000-08:00

Here is my review for the Force Unleashed II ... I found it ... Well see below for the madness.

You are in the game!

2010-11-08T02:37:00.000-08:00

Reading this the other day I envisioned that once the dream outlined below comes true Steve Jobs will stand in front of a group of self important tossers and say:

"Hi everyone. Look, I just wanted to come out here and apologise, the whole Ipad thing was a bit of a rip off and in the end was a step backwards for the business. Seriously though, you try coming up with a new way to 'advance the way we view technology' every couple of years and tell me how well you do. So with that out of the way, lets talk about how we're going to let you kill each other."

Bearing all that in mind, lets talk about the new patent Apple has submitted in the US, “Interactive Gaming with Co-Located, Networked Direction and Location Awareness.” Or as I'm going to call it from now on, 'The Hunter'. What is this thing you might ask, and rightly you should, well looking into the future Apple have seen that with the rise of 'interactive gaming' there is a lucrative market that they haven't been taping into and have thus decided to make the bold leap towards it.

But wait! I hear you say (and yes you're voice is pink in this) How does that work? The Iphone is made to play games on the go, you can't exactly attach a waving remote to it and control it like that can you?

Well lets get down to the nitty gritty. The Hunter would be a mass interaction network where you would all connect to each other over a large GPS network so you would be able to locate each other and see where you are in compass reference to each other. So how does that affect gaming, it seems like it should be more of a possessive parent app? Well here is my idea:

1. Give each icon for the people a drop down menu, this can list things that we may need to know about them (I'll come back to this in a second)

2. Release a laser tag style game system where by people have shirts that have a sensor array in the centre as well as a 'gun' they can use. because what I'm envisioning would be playable in a major city centre these 'guns' could take the form of a sonic screwdriver or even a wand.

3. Back to the drop down menu, you could give a list of weapons as well as a status, which would be avalible depending which game one was playing.

So what has this all been leading to?? A gigantic and structured game of either Humans vs Zombies or Assassins. Call me mad, but this is my new dream.

SUCK IT MOTION CONTROLS!

My Peace With Bay

2010-11-04T06:01:00.000-07:00

I think the title explains it all.... enjoy?

Trailer Knife 3D

2010-11-03T14:19:00.000-07:00

This week I take the Knives to some trailers for upcoming 3D movies and we'll see the good, the bad and the downright wrist splittingly ugly.

FurtherNote: This video is hosted on Blip TV purely because of the size, so if people have any trouble with this format let me know and I'll put a split part version up on Youtube.

What else is coming in November?

2010-10-31T05:11:00.000-07:00

So thats whats going on in films, but how about the video games? Well...

Studio: Treyarch
Preceded by: Modern Warfare 2 (or World at War for the Purists)
Genre: First Person Action Shooter
Release Date: 9th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Well you see, rather than thinking this was something else, I just misread the title, you see I thought it was Black Opps. So I thought this was just a press release addressing the fact that while there was cultural diversity in the American team for Modern Warfare, they were now apologising for the fact that they were in no other team and that no other races were present.
What is it really about:
Call of Duty: Black Ops takes place during the Cold War. The player mainly controls two characters: Alex Mason and Jason Hudson who are Studies and Observations Group operatives on missions behind enemy lines, in locations such as the Ural Mountains, Laos, Cuba, and Vietnam.
Why will it be good:
Call of Duty as a series has never been much more than random encounters in different locations and a focus on multiplayer, but it does it so well what more could you ask for? Hell when we're bored my brother and I will even pull out MW2 and just shoot each other, no co-op, just shooting one another. Thats how well these games do this job This will get hours of play over X-box live and Playstation Network.

Why will it suck:
There is a problem with this idea though, the game hasn't been made by Infinity Ward... so whether these new jokers can transfer across the fun and excitment that was captured in the Modern Warfare games, or whether this will be another World at War, remains to be seen.The other thing that pisses me off about this is simple... It's set in the goddamn cold war again! I spoke on this in my Salt Review, the Cold war is fast becoming a tired and overused Trope that holds no true fright or scare for your target audience any more because they didn't have to live through it. Yes I'm sure for people who hid in their basements for days on end during the Cuban missile crisis would find this subject material tense and interesting, but for someone who was a glint in the eye when the Berlin wall was coming down, I don't find this the least bit compelling.
Anticipation:

Studio:Team Sonic
Preceded by: Every god damn shitty new Sonic game that diverts from the old formula
Genre: Fantasy adventure (sports?) game
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Sonic is transported back to the 1700s and must teach the people he meets about racial tolerance. The final scene has him running rings around a giant KK Klansman and eventually using the power of love to destroy it.(By the way I promise this is the last race joke for a while)
What is it really about:
After apparently developing a sense of remorse for his past indiscretions, Dr. Eggman supposedly turns a new leaf and builds an intergalactic amusement park up in space, made up of several planet sized attractions. However, the true purpose of this amusement park is to capture the alien inhabitants of these planets, known as Wisps, and harness their colored energy for his nefarious plans. A Wisp named Yacker informs Sonic who, accompanied by Tails, embarks on a journey to Dr. Eggman's amusement park to free the imprisoned Wisps inhabiting each planet and thwart Dr. Eggman's plans.
Why will it be good:
Umm... aaahhh... It will have some of the old fashioned running aspects?
Why will it suck:
Okay this one is a lot easier. The sonic franchise as a whole has never particularly interested me, the originals games with their running jumpy fun was supposed to be a more ramped up and extreme version of the classic Mario run across screen bit, but it still felt like something that I would pick up and rush through once and then never replay. considering you could finish these games in an hour this wasn't a good thing. But I guess I can't hang my hat on that I mean the gameplay also includes these whisp powers that unlock new areas and wi... Hang on isn't this just an attempt to slow us down and detract from the boredom of running fast repetitively. While this is admirable they seem to have forgotten the reason anyone liked/played your series was because it was just fast running, so stopping and slowing down will probably only aggravate people.
Anticipation:

Studio: Microsoft Studios
Preceded by: Dignity (But they gave that up to make this)
Genre: "Casual Gaming"
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Selling as many of these damn little motion sensors so that Microsoft might steal some of Nintendo's market.
What is it really about:
Creating a new and innovative game experience through the use of a controller less system in order to .... sell as many of these damn little motion sensors so that Microsoft might steal some of Nintendo's market (huh what do you know I got it right)
Why will it be good:
As much as I think moving into this area is selling out the games for gamers ideals that Microsoft started with, I have to admit that this concept does make me think we are getting closer to that dystopia future everyone is always making films about (finally). So basically I think it is the good thing that this is a valiant step towards the machine apocalypse.
Why will it suck:
Sellout Sellout SELLOUT!!!! Seriously I get that Microsoft and Sony lose thousands of dollars in console sales every year through the Nintendo wrist exerciser, but I would have thought the the dedicated fans who buy pretty much every game that comes out was better than having a lot of fickle fans who only buy from you every couple of months? The other reason this may suck, and I'm only saying this as a possibly rather than a definite, is that the device may not be as solid as thy say it is, I mean at the moment the Nintendo waggle stick is the best motion device and in all honesty it isn't nearly as responsive as it needs to be for any sort of serious gameplay.
Anticipation:

Studio: Ubisoft
Preceded by: Assassin's Creed 2
Genre: Stealth Action Adventure
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Purely a Multiplayer port for AC2
What is it really about:
Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood will keep its sandbox style gameplay in an open world of Italy. Like the previous installments, the gameplay's core mechanics are based on parkour movements, crowd-blending stealth, assassinations and melee fighting system. However for the first time in the series, the game offers a multiplayer mode alongside 15 hours of singleplayer campaign
Why will it be good:
For those who don't know, I have University exams up until the 18th of November. On the 18th of November I plan to do 2 things following the end of my exam. 1. Go out and buy Force Unleashed 2. 2. Go out and by Brotherhood. This game looks seriously kick ass. While Ubisoft maintain this is a separate entry to the Creed series rather than the third in the trilogy, and while it is the continuation of Ezio story there are also parts of Desmond for people, like me, who enjoy his story. As well as that this is the first AC game to feature a Multiplayer where you run around assassinating each other... Thats... Freaking... AWESOME! And finally it has all the usual running and jumping that is a staple of this superb series.
Why will it suck:
If I wake up and this is all a dream
Anticipation:

Dear Hollywood ..... WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-10-26T16:37:00.000-07:00

You know its a funny thing, over the many months that I've had this blog and bitched and moaned about people who make the things I like I've never taken a crack at Uwe Boll. It's surprising really because most people call him a cinematic Hitler and you'd think he'd be one of the first people whoes nuts I'd want to stick in a blender and then force feed him the result. I guess its mostly because he has lacked the wide enough reach to get himself onto an Australian screen and I can't be assed to go and find a dvd of his films. Bot now there has been some brief information released that has pushed my annoyance meter into high gear.

So here's what I found out (Presented with a STOP at each point I had to stop reading for fear of self harm):

Poster:

STOP

Uwe Boll's next film will be called Blubberella

STOP

It's about an Obese superheroine who "will kick major ass - with her major ass."

STOP

So thats where my first source of information ran out and I managed to put down the kitchen knife before I did something rash. But then, because I'm a sucker for torture, I went and had a look on line and found this quote from Boll:

"The cast includes Michael Paré, Clint Howard, Steggan Mennekes and me…I play Hitler"

...

...

...

I just want to repeat that for everyone. Uwe Boll is going to play the role of Adolf 'Friggin' Hitler in his next movie, which by extention means that Adolf ' Genocidal Maniac' Hitler will be in Uwe 'As if this guy has any sense of subtlty and respect when dealing with a topic like this' Boll's next film.

SLITS WRISTS

So in summary, this will suck and I'm not actually the Gentleman but his first clone Gentleman 2, but please just call me Gentleman, it'll be easier that way.

The Death of The Doctor

2010-10-25T22:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, I will not be able to get to reviewing The Death Of the doctor for at least 2 weeks... but to tide you over let me give you my first thoughts and that pic above:

"Damn you Davis, where do you get off taking something bad and making it good?"

The Knife: Et tu Lucas?

2010-10-24T21:58:00.000-07:00

This is more of an audio rant, so only one pic today everyone.

Whats to come in November.

2010-10-20T05:29:00.000-07:00

So I was flicking through the paper the other day and I saw that the list of must see films of the next month and I thought to my self that they were sort of lack-luster and have now put it upon myself to talk about the things coming out this November... So lets begin.

So lets begin with films:

Director: Tom McGrath

Starring: Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Jonah Hill, David Cross, Brad Pitt

Genre: Animated Comedic Romantic Actionic Super Hero Movie

First Release Date: 5th of November 2010

What did I think it was about (This is what I thought the movie was about when I first saw the title):

This is the tale of a scientist playing with the forces of Nature in order to expand his own mind, and one day he does so... Literally, now with his head threatening to push the earth out of its orbit the scientist must go on a journey of self discovery before eventually realising that the only way to save the earth is to kill himself... This would be a touching piece.

What is it really about:

Megamind (Will Ferrell) and his life-long archenemy Metro Man (Brad Pitt) are aliens that were sent away from their respective home planets in time of crisis (much like Superman's origin story), with Metro Man ending up a popular celebrity and Megamind becoming a belittled outcast due to his unintentionally disastrous intellect. Megamind, taking the role of super villain, tries to conquer Metro City in every imaginable way, each attempt a colossal failure thanks to Metro Man, who becomes known as the city's hero. It seems that the pattern will never cease until Megamind seemingly defeats Metro Man during one of his many botched hostage plots involving news reporter Roxanne Ritchi (Tina Fey). Now freed from his rival's shadow, Megamind proceeds to take control of Metro City. Over time, Megamind comes to the realization that he no longer has any purpose in life without an enemy. To appease his depression, he turns Roxanne's lonely cameraman Hal (Jonah Hill) into Metro City's next big superhero, the fiery-headed Titan. Unfortunately for Megamind, Titan decides to utilize his new power against humanity as revenge for the lifetime of rejection he has endured. When Metro Man is discovered alive by Megamind and Roxanne, but uninterested in resuming his superhero duties, Megamind is forced to do the inevitable: become the hero of the crisis. Aided by his childhood, fish-like sidekick Minion (David Cross), Megamind now sets out to stop Titan's rampage of destruction, thus beginning a path to redemption.

Why will it be good:

Well just based on the premise I wanted to see this film, it seemed to take the ideas presented in something like Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, and add kid friendly slap-stick. The other thing that turns me onto this film is the cast. Will Farrel is always enjoyable, the little I've seen of Tina Fey has always been solid, and it has my favourite mainstream "hot" actor Brad Pitt in it.

Why will it suck:

The Main problem that can come out of movies like this is that they sometimes run out of comedy ideas into the third act and just try to skate around it by having a message and a large fight scene. Seeing something like this would detract from the comedy that I've seen from the trailers and the leaked clips

Anticipation:

Director: Danny Boyle

Starring: James Franco

Genre: According to Boyle this will be "An action movie about a guy who can't move", but it looks to be more of a dramatic thriller.

First Release Date: 5th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

I thought this was the first release of a Japanese torture film. The entire film would run for 127 Hours and would only show the Hello Kitty face slowly making a rotation around the screen, making one full revolution every hour. The background music is this annoying Jpop song

What is it really about:

Hiker Aron Ralston (James Franco) is trapped in an isolated canyon after a fallen boulder crushes his arm while he is hiking in Utah. Over the next five days, Ralston examines his life and survives the elements before amputating his own arm to free himself from the boulder. Ralston then scales a 65 foot wall and hikes over eight miles before he is finally rescued

Why it will be good:

Okay I'm not a Boyle fan and I haven't seen anything that this man has done, but from what trusted sources tell me... Boyle is a dramatic genius, with such classics as Slumdog Millionaire and Trainspotting the man has a Midas touch, so just going off what people have told me. This film should be good.

Why it will suck:

Two reasons: 1. There is over an hour in this film without speech ... No matter how good you are as a director you'd need to be on your absolute a game to make a section like this interesting, and it has a high chance of failure. 2. The entire plot is pretty well contained in that summery I gave above, aside from him thinking about some of the people he has met, the whole film is not much more than that, so once again the thing I worry about is whether it would keep my interest.

Anticipation:

Director: Brothers Strause

Starring: Eric Balfour,Scottie Thompson,Donald Faison

Genre: Science Fiction Thriller

First release date: 12th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

This movie was a comedy about a struggling architect who finds the plans for a building that will quite literally touch the sky. However once his new building is created the touch releases the 'sky demons' from their slumber and they begin attacking colonies on the earth. Outcast from his own people the architect and his zany assistant set out to hunt down the real architect and work out how to save the earth.

What is it really about:

After a night of partying, a group of friends are distracted when beams of light awaken everyone in Los Angeles, that then attracts every person like a moth to a flame. As the night progresses, they soon discover that once addicted to the light they vanish into thin air, as well as extraterrestrial forces that later threaten to swallow the entire human race.

Why it will be good:

The history of these medium budget has been pretty good, as long as the central idea is solid then they should be okay. Also the guys who are directing and producing this film are supposed to be technical wizards, so the effects for the people being sucked up into the sky should look pretty spectacular.

Why it will suck:

I'm sorry but that story sounds so bad, people get sucked up into the sky on mass, light moths to a light, and there are aliens running around.. It doesn't exactly sound brilliant, but then again it could be the brilliant directing that brings us around. So what else have these brothers directed? Aliens versus Predators: Requiem... Do I have to explain why this is a bad thing?

Anticipation:

Director: David Yates

Starring: The same group of talented British actors that they always get, plus Rhys Ifans this time

Genre: Fantasy Classic

First release date: 18th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

Well I would try and make a Joke, but come on it's Harry Potter everyone knows what its about. So instead I'll just go with this SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE!!

What is it really about:

Voldemort's power is growing stronger. He now has control over the Ministry of Magic and Hogwarts. Harry, Ron, and Hermione decide to finish Dumbledore's work and find the rest of the Horcruxes to defeat the Dark Lord. But little hope remains for the Trio, and the rest of the Wizarding World, so everything they do must go as planned.

Why it will be good:

Once again I'll point out that I didn't see the last film so this is just my gut reaction going on the advertising, but from seeing the rest of the series and the trailers, it seems as though the one thing that was always holding back the series has gone. This movie is not set in Hogwarts. Hallelujah!! As amazing as it was in the first film to see the whole thing brought to life, I honestly felt that it began to wear on me the endless amounts of discussions in the corridors, up the stars and in the yard. It was like their voices were equipped with cheese graters. So seeing that this would be a bit moire like an action movie is a welcome addition as far as I'm concerned. And it does bring me to something I've always wanted to see. A detective / bounty hunter movie based in the Harry Potter verse... Think about it.

Why it will suck:
Once again these films have a terrible habit to conform to a set formula... and the formula sucks. You know the one, Harry whines, Ron does bad comic relief stuff, Hermione is uptight and bitchy, the supporting cast pops in, we say some spells, Voldermort pops up and then insert the book exclusive stuff here. For the most recent 2 films also add sexual teenage angst in there too.

Anticipation:

Director(s): Nathan Greno & Byron Howard

Starring: Mandy Moore, Zachary Levi, Donna Murphy

Genre: Animated Romantic Adventure

First release date: 24th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:
The story of a manic-depressive OCD sufferer who is locked in a tangled headphone speaker factory and told he will be killed if he hasn't escaped the facility by the morning. The story focuses on his mental battle as he attempts to find a way to make it out and avoid the little Id in his head.

What is it really about:
Princess Rapunzel was born with magical hair that restores youth. While she was still a baby, a woman named Mother Gothel kidnapped her to take the youth-restoring power for herself. Rapunzel grew up locked in a tower, taught by Mother Gothel that the world is a horrible place, and not being told that she is a princess. Every year on Rapunzel's birthday, the kingdom has a festival of lights to remember their lost princess by. Rapunzel sees the lights from her window and longs to visit the kingdom. One day, a thief named Flynn Rider breaks into her tower. Rapunzel takes his satchel containing the stolen crown jewels. She promises to return it if he will help her out of the tower and take her to the light festival, and Flynn agrees. Later, Rapunzel realizes that she has fallen in love with him.

Why it will be good:
This film will be done in the classic Disney animation, with the classic Disney animation music and will be the 50th Disney movie done in this way. In general the Disney writing and characterisation is always good.

Why it will suck:
The story has to do with Rapunzel's magic hair... MAGIC HAIR! Dear god what kind of story can you tell with magic hair. The plot of this thing seems so fomulaic and as the obvious Disney story line. That everyone sings songs and smiles and the two main characters fall in love. As well as that, you know in action films when the main burly testosterone hero has a side kick, they will be female with the kind of body that puts a Barbie doll to shame, the same sort of thing is being done with the male lead, he is there purely to bring in the young boys who have no interest in princesses. The problem with this? This leaves us with a character who is, rather than being developed and interesting, a stereotype that won't really develop.

Anticipation:

So that's my Films for November, stay tuned for my Video Games list.

A Video Addressed to the Desk of Mr Russell T. Davies

2010-10-18T02:14:00.001-07:00

Force Unleashed 2 Trailer #2

2010-10-08T06:07:00.000-07:00

Oh my god how cool does this look? It is amazing! After years of watching dodgy Star Wars prequels I now know what it was all for ... THIS!

Let me explain that above Geekqueal (Geek Squeal), this trailer brings together a lot of different elements from the prequels and uses them at the full state they needed. The cloning is obviously the major indicator, but there are others there too, the savage separatist state where he meets the God Rankor, Degobah and others. But it is the cloning that is my major focus. It was stated at the start of the second prequel that they couldn't clone Jedi... it is this small nugget of information that holds this story together, so are they still not able to and Starkiller came back another way? Or have they got it but it isn't woking to perfection yet?

All I know is that I am looking forward to this and my exams can't finish soon enough so I can play it.

The New Transformers 3 Title Rant

2010-10-07T18:22:00.001-07:00

Dear God... This is going to hurt.

The Knife: The Bay Effect

2010-10-04T16:35:00.000-07:00

Today I sit down to study the Bay effect:

Slow slink back

2010-10-02T02:35:00.000-07:00

Why hello!

So as some of you may know I have recently decided that I will be beginning a quest for world domination, so as part of this I have spent the last 2 weeks in the Himalayas with a mad soviet scientist learning the ways of the sickle. So what am I going to do as my come back, why tear into a Doctor Who spin off of course!

So this is the episode called "The Death of the Doctor" which will be the third episode screened of the new Sarah Jane Adventures Series. In theory there is nothing wrong with this episode... okay in theory there is alot wrong with this show, but lets start with the good things:
1. It has the eleventh Doctor in it. I can't expand on that till I see some footage of him but anything with the Doctor is always an up for me.
2. It has two companions and from the clip I am looking forward to it. The interaction between Sarah and Jo is reminding me a lot of the School episode of DW series 2 how the companions share their experience and an appreciation of what spending time with the Doctor can mean.

But there are also 3 problems evident:
1. There are the kids in it. For every Doctor loving ex-companion conversation this episode will have it will have equal or even out-weighted amounts of 'kiddy' dialogue I know this come with the territory of a kids show label but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it.
2. The Villains... Oh the villains, they look like Jim Henson rejects, and they aren't scary in the slightest, I payed the last Doctor episode because it had him up against the last of the trickster bragade and I really would liked to have seen a full episode with 'The Trickster' but these guys don't seem to be scary at all, it is almost asthough a real hack with an axe to grind has come back to write...
3. Which effortlessly streamlines me into my next point the episode is written by Russell T. Davis. I am not going into this you all know what I think of him and thus you can work it out on your own why this is bad.

So yes to recap, I am now going on to take over the world and this episode will be good if you intermittently black out when the ex-companions and the Doctor is on screen.

Verdict: The Original Batman Films

2010-09-19T05:19:00.000-07:00

The Original Batman Films

This week I go back over the old Batman movies because... well I got all the films on DVD and it seemed like a good idea. So lets all look at them all separately, starting with:

BATMAN:

Wow, is it just me or is the quality of Circ Du Soleil really going downhill

Tim Burton's first film was quite an interesting experience, going in I knew that I would inevitably compare the film to The Dark Knight (In a mirror of the Heath Ledger problem). But from the start my fears were immediately allayed. Batman is a very different movie to Knight, while they both are dripping with grit, Batman does it in Tim Burton's usual fashion where it is so stylised you don't know how to take it is it so far gone in a self-knowing ironic way, or is it serious? I'm still not one hundred percent sure but I'm leaning toward the later. Anyway in this film the title character was played by Michael Keaton (an actor who I haven't seen much of) and it was a really strong performance, not quite the terminally unhinged performance Bale brings, rather it is one I found more enjoyable to watch as he moves through his times as Bruce Wayne with a self saddening glide, as though he is troubled by the unfortunate duality he leads. While as Batman he is akin to smoke, there one minute and gone from site the next, it reminded me a lot of the Batman in Arkham Asylum. And now to address the thing that concerned me the most.... The Joker. Let me explain, I think that Heath Ledgers Joker could be the single greatest character portrayal I have seen in all my experience, so I was hesitant to compare the two men, however Nicholson's Joker proved to be a different beast, rather than a self assured man who only wants to show everyone how mad they are, Nicholson's Joker was just there for 'te LOLz' and I want to go along with it in that fun spirited sort of way. It wasn't without it's flaws though, the Joker was like the one splash of colour in the otherwise dreary city and while sometimes that could be exiliratingly funny, but there were too many occasions that it felt out of touch with the rest of the film.

BATMAN RETURNS:

hmm... I think we're doing it wrong

I feel as though I can't add much to the first tow aspects of my previous review here, Burton was still Burton and Keaton was still good. It is the change in villains that really sets this piece apart, with the superhero laws of movies demanding two villains we now get the Penguin, as a spurned freak who only wants vengeance despite the direction of Max Shreck, and Catwoman a nebish office worker turned sexual goddess thanks to some cats. Lets start by letting the cat out of the bag:

So in this film Catwoman acts as the principal love interest toying with Batman and trying to get Bruce Wayne into her Batcave. I think this character is a lot better built for Burton's trademark style as she can fit in with the darkness and the light, as reflected by her personality. The Penguin also works really well, being played to the point of grotesque by Danny DeVito (Whose back catalogue I now want to raid) once again the character fits better with the scenes he finds himself in and clashes less than the Joker. So in the end I rate Batman Returns higher than Batman, but not quite up to Nolan standard

BATMAN FOREVER:

"If I could just reach my Bat Orgasm spr.. Ahh there we go"

And now we enter Schumacher ville, I promised a friend I would enter this as I would an episode of Batman: The Brave and the Bold. So keeping that in mind lets begin with the villains. Dressed in colourful clothes and fancy purple make-up Tommy Lee Jones is Two Face and if done right I would have nothing wrong with this, however because the film seems so determined to harp on about duality and his bloody coin I felt as though old Face was a bad choice as a villain, if they had just had him as a homicidal lunatic who determined people fate with a coins, so with out the whole DA back story I would have like it a lot more. And then the other villain is the Riddler played by Jim Carey in good old Jim Carey fashion, and I honestly thought I would never say anything like this but.... This version has killed all other versions of the Riddler as I don't think any others will work. The Riddler is the perfect villain for this campy style Batman, he is hilarious and the right level of unhinged to get it across with out clashing with the overall message of the thing. As for the directing, the world Schumacher creates is the nice blend of colour and darkness to make it interesting to watch the cinematography at least. Now if you are wondering why they mix colour with darkness, the big wigs at WB wanted the Batman series to become more family friendly and thus sent it to Schumacher to kiddy-ies so this is meant to be the easing process, with the next film being the full fledged cam version. Darkness you say? But the villains were bright colours and lights? Ahh well that's where Batman comes in, Val Kilmer isn't quite up to the same standard as Micheal Keaton and when he speaks it is like I can see the puppeteer putting his hands up his ass and making the motions, but as the Jokers colour clashed with the darkness of Batman then Batman's darkness clashes with colour of Batman Forever. And Robin was not needed, seriously Batman could have easily taken both of them out, and he pretty much did, so aside from holding a few storylines together I would have cut Robin.

BATMAN & ROBIN:

The movie a lot of people seemed to think they were watching

... Okay I don't know why this requires a review, either you've seen it and didn't mind it or you want to tie Joel Schumacher down to the railway tracks and set moustache twirling Justice on him. So as far as I'm concerned this movie was just bland, there was nothing about it to set it out as good or memorable and nothing in there like say.... large robot testicles to make me want to hate it. So why do people hate it, well I think that rather than it being the "WRST MVIE EVAR!" it is more what it represents. This movie was the thing that killed the Burton franchise, gone was the dark and brooding Batman of the Burton days, now we had George Clooney and his crotch shots, I mean could you imagine if in the next Batman film Hippy man was made the villain, it would completely tarnish everything that has come before, including Heath Ledger's performance. No this isn't Transformers 2, so I can't hate it, but here is someone who can:

Summing up:

So the whole lot were a steady progression from above middle, top, below 1 and at the middle point, so the Verdict?

Verdict:

5 Things I learnt from: Salt

2010-09-13T20:34:00.000-07:00

Today I look at the lady spy film Salt and attempt to rub some into a wound.

Oh please, did you really expect me to put a picture of her in her pants up? it's a PG13 blog people!

1. More underwear
Okay so it was only the opening scene, but Salt has been captured by North Korean agents as a spy and they are interrogating her... by pumping her full of liquids.... in her underwear. Again this is the only scene where she is dressed this way, but it sticks in your head. Not only because it features Angelina Jolie in her notably mentionable unmentionables but because it is the first scene, it sets the tone for the whole film, and ms Jolie in her wears says to me: "Hey this movie features a hot chick, so you should really enjoy this you sucker jawed youth".

And when one of the main man action heroes is this guy are you really surprised?

2. Male action heros love the sound of their own voice.
In Salt the main character will go large portions of time where she won't say anything, just skulk around the sides trying to put her plans into action, where as if you watch another action film with a male lead, you can barely go 10 minutes with out having either some piece of self-serving expositional dialogue or a narration of how they are thinking of taking a leak. But I don't blame the male leads I rather blame the Hollywood producers who believe that you can't get people to watch a movie unless there is a pair of breasts bouncing around on the screen, you want to know why the male heroes talk more, because they have to spoon feed the audience this romance that more often than not doesn't need to be in this movie. I mean imagine if in Romeo and Juliet Romeo had worked for the ISP (Italian Spy Peoples) do you really think with all the explosions and assassin's trying to get him he would have cared about the wet fish of a girl who was only interesting when he had nothing better to do? I think not.

This is what we in the biz call and "Indy in a fridge" Jr

3. Plot convenience is exacerbated
SO Salt manages to make it look like she killed the Russian President by shooing him full of spider venom that makes him look like he is dead and she knows this because her husband happened to be a spider studier/wrangler. How big a plot convenience is that? I mean really, in the Bourne movies aside from finding handy supplies of arms in various places it is all fairly well set up and conveniounce free.

After a male operative leaves / After a female operative leaves

4. Kill Frenzy is Fun Frenzy
So in a generic spy film, if the spy goes rouge then they kill everyone until they can get to the top guy and say 'wait don't shoot I didn't do it, see look at my smiley face'. While in Salt only the Russians get killed by Salt whilst the good pure and righteous Americans only get knocked out. I'm not saying this is better or worse, but it could be seen as a move towards avoiding a female anti-hero.

5. The Cold War is a new ideas bargin bucket

A game, a book and a movie

The Cold War escalated! The Russians were up to something! There a secret Soviets hiding in America! Why does it seem there is an out break of Cold War styled stories across all medias? Why can't we have that We Australians got mad with the Americans for some reason and tries to pull this same stunt? I would make about as much sense in this political climate.

Verdict: Joss Whedon

2010-09-12T04:40:00.000-07:00

Joss Whedon

Another week, another verdict. This week I look at the geek overlord Joss Whedon and whether his recent catalogue matches the cult of personality.

History:
The young Joss was born to father and fellow writer Tom Whedon, he had a love of Monty Python, films and writing. After writing scripts for TV-shows such as Roseanne and Parenthood, he then moved into a brief job as a script doctor (Note: He worked on Pixar's first film Toy Story in this capacity) before returning to television to create the hit TV shows Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel and Dollhouse. He has recently been secured as the director of Marvel comics upcoming Avengers movie.

Thoughts:
Okay because there is more than one show I am judging him on, I'm going to look at all of them separately.

The cast of Firefly... Crowned geek gods one and all

Firefly was Joss Whedon's Space Western Drama that only lasted one season. The problem with the show was a poor timeslot and mishandling by FOX. I thought the show itself was really good, it managed to make relatable and interesting characters regardless of which episode you watched as well as imbuing them with humour. The show rightly enjoys a cult status now as fans (known as "Browncoats") get together to act out elaborate staging of their own adventures in Whedon's 'Verse'. The thing about Firefly is that it is frustrating, not the Davies kind of frustrating where brilliance can be crushed under mediocrity, but the kind of frustration where something that is good goes unfulfilled. Yes I know he tied it all up with Serenity, but aside from a couple of invested character deaths I didn't feel anything for that movie. However I don't hold that against him because having that unfulfilled universe allows literary geeks (like me) to fill in the blanks ourselves (see the outbreak of RPFirefly forums)

The Doctor is on the Rise

Dr Horrible's Sing-along Blog on the other hand was a piece genre smashing brilliance, taking a superhero story and not only flipping it to make the villain the protagonist, but also embedding it with some wicked humour and music! Seriously it was this on it's own that made me like Whedon and it was Firefly and his writing experience that allayed fears for the Avengers. The fact that I not only feel empathy for the Geek who considers himself a joker with a conscious, but also laugh when the same guy breaks into song is something really rare to find on the internet. Yhea that's right, not only is it awesome but Dr Horrible's Sing-along Blog has also broken away and proven to the TV fat cats that you don't need their healthy swag of money to make something profitable and well loved.

Stompity stomp stomp

Summing Up:
So, I wonder what I think of Joss? He has been a constantly stellar writer and continues to make, and be put in charge of some hot geek properties (*cough* Avengers), so yeah this one is easy.

Verdict:

The Knifing: Kinect

2010-09-10T03:52:00.000-07:00

Today I lay the knives into the Microsoft Kinect business model.

Video time

2010-09-07T17:48:00.000-07:00

Okay I know posting a video is kind of a cop out for content, but what do you want from me there is a lack of stuff out there. Anyway so the Proms were on last night and as usual Doctor Who (Wow I have been posting alot on Who for the past few days... I promise there will be something different next time) did a skit and Matt Smith just made a boys dreams come true.

The problem with Sarah Jane

2010-09-06T19:21:00.000-07:00

Seriously I know the show needs kiddie-esque villains, but the last doctor got the trickster, a manipulator of time and space for the means of evil... What did Matt do to get a freaking bird as his enemy???

Well hello there children, it's time for a story, are you ready for story time?

Very good

The Sarah Jane Smith Adventures and I have an understanding, they can go off and do their own thing away from me, and I won't beat the kiddie desecration of Who with a large stick. But least year they had the episode Sarah Jane's Wedding, now while this on it's own wasn't enough to interest me the fact that it featured the first cross over appearance of the Doctor (then David Tennant) was enough to pique my interest. You see if we look back to last year we were suffering from a massive Who drought and any looks at Tennant's sexy Doctor were welcome and because I was desperate I was willing to grin and bear the kiddieness.

However it seems that the crossover must have been well watched because it's back again with the new Doctor (Matt 'Bowtie' Smith) with an enemy that looks like a cross between a vulture and a Jim Henson puppet. This raises 2 issues for the show, 1. Because the Doctor is there it breaks our pact and opens itself up to me watching it and murdering it, and 2. the episode will be written by Russell T. Davis.

There will be Blood!

Verdict: Russell T. Davies

2010-09-05T21:31:00.000-07:00

Russell T. Davies

So I was writing on the Hugo awards last night and I touched on my views on Russell T. Davies, and I realised that while I had easily ladled him in my dislike category I had never justified the decision, so in order to make you all understand and because it is my 50th post and thus special I'll now deliver my Verdict on Russell T. Davies.

History:

Considered one of Davies better shows... supposedly

Russell was born Steven Russell Davies on 27 April 1963 in Wales, his mother suffering a reaction to a morphine drip suffered a phsycotic episode not long after his birth and was institutionalised. With a fairly normal drama childhood the young Russell moved into writing and penned the acclaimed Series Queer as Folk, Bob & Rose and The Second Coming. He is most known for helming the revival of Doctor Who in 2005 and creating the spin-off series Torchwood and The Sarah Jane Adventures. At the beginning of 2010 he left Doctor Who in the hands of Steven Moffat, he continues to watch over and write episodes for the spin off with his new series Torchwood: New World take up a fair chunk of his time.

Thoughts:

A terrible monster from new Who and a Pepperpot.

I'm not going to claim to have any knowledge of Mr Davies non-Who related work so it is entirely possible that Queer as Folk is the greatest series in the history of mankind and it would completely change my views on the man if I saw it, but I'm here to focus on Who so here comes the pain. Mr Davies will always have a place in my heart for reviving Doctor Who and his over-watch of the seasons has maintained a fairly enjoyable experience all round. The problem I have is that his writing can be so brilliantly frustrating, so hit and miss that I can't in good conscious look forward to anything he does. While he has written some great episodes such as Midnight and Waters of Mars that look at the subject of unseen fear and horror and the inner-most psyche of The Doctor makes me marvel at the way that the subject matter can be twisted. The problem is that for everyone of those episodes there are two Journey's End and The Last of the Time Lords, episodes where not only does science fiction gain the level of magic but he takes to wanking off his fan base with such gusto that one has to wonder if he has missed out on his perfect career. To take The Last of the Time Lords as a demonstration of the first one, where the previous season ender Doomsday set up a good solid device to allow transport between realities and a marvellous use of 3D glasses in order to clear up the massive building mess that Russell had created but in The Last of the Time Lords, The Doctor is revived from a gollum like state by the power of thought...

David Tennat's audition for the role of Doctor Manhattan... to many clothes.

WTF? I get that the arch-angel network connects the minds but how can the Doctor draw power from that? He isn't The Destructor from Ghostbusters who became the 'Stay Puff Marshmallow Man', and so as far as I know The Doctor can't just click his fingers and find a plot convenient way to get out of the situation, a way has to be properly weaved in and made available to the audience whilst staying hidden from their sight, see Amy's Choice. The other major complaint is the excessive ammounts of fan wank, take for example the End of Time Part 2. Now the End of Time Part 2 had a total running time of 71 minutes, one of the longest DW episodes ever, but about the last 20 minutes of the episode isn't needed, after the Doctor throws his tantrum and rescues Wilf he could have just limped back to the TARDIS and regenerated, but no, Davies has to go back over each and every companion this Doctor has had and give them an unbearably happy ending, Martha and Mickey get married, Donna gets married and the Doctor gives her a lot of money and Rose gets a nice smiley moment with The Doctor, and for some strange reason we go to a descendant of Nurse Redfern, remember her she was in that 2-parter 2 bloody seasons ago! But to head back to the proper companions for a moment, there will be people out there who call me a bit of a Grinch because 'Doesn't David, have my babies, Tennant deserve to have a nice ending', and yes I would agree with that and this episode would be fine to do it... if we hadn't had the same thing one and a half years ago! Seriously Journey's End ended with the same sort of all smiles ending as the companions (except Donna) all walked off happy and fulfilled, so what was the point doing it again?

"We've reached the Journey's End, Having a laugh inside the TARDIS, thought it didn't make much sense, It's always nice to see them Daleks" - Chameleon Circuit

That last part has reminded me of a single instance reason I dislike Davies, the retcon. At the end of Doomsday Rose and The Doctor were separated by dimensions and one could assume she was beyond return, but peoples hearts all over the world broke as The Doctor was unable to tell Rose he loved her. It was sad but poionient that as much as The Doctor is a necessary force of the world you must keep your distance personally because he just causes destruction. As sad as it was I respected Davies for doing it. But then he went and made it so Rose gets her own personal human Doctor because she is the bestest companion or something. And it destoryed the message he had conveyed so well in Doomsday.

Thanks Seduff for the image

Torchwood seems to deliver a different style, where people die and tragedy strikes often, for that reason I look upon Children of Earth as a better Who finale than any of his real Who finales.

Summing Up:
So what do I think? Well he isn't a bad writer if he lays off the fan love and was more reasonable in his endings, but because of the forced smile ending he seems so determined to strong arm into everything, I have problems with him.

Verdict:

Hugo and the Doctor, 2 friends tied at the hip.

2010-09-05T08:14:00.000-07:00

So the illustrious Hugo awards for science fiction have come and gone for another year and we at the far end of the Geek spectrum are left to awe at the winners and loser we find before us. So rather than delve into the sections on Books and fan-fiction that I know nothing about and have no interest in I'll skip to the Film and TV categories and de-construct them.

BEST DRAMATIC PRESENTATION - LONG FORM
Nominees:
Avatar Screenplay and Directed by James Cameron (Twentieth Century Fox)
District 9 Screenplay by Neill Blomkamp & Terri Tatchell; Directed by Neill Blomkamp (TriStar Pictures)
Moon Screenplay by Nathan Parker; Story by Duncan Jones; Directed by Duncan Jones (Liberty Films)
Star Trek Screenplay by Robert Orci & Alex Kurtzman; Directed by J.J. Abrams (Paramount)
Up Screenplay by Bob Peterson & Pete Docter; Story by Bob Peterson, Pete Docter, & Thomas McCarthy; Directed by Bob Peterson & Pete Docter (Disney/Pixar)

Winner:
Moon Screenplay by Nathan Parker; Story by Duncan Jones; Directed by Duncan Jones (Liberty Films)

So looking at the list this was a very strong group, and it would have been hard to pick a winner lets look a how it might have gone in regards to a 100 meter dash between the nominees.

Next category:

BEST DRAMATIC PRESENTATION - SHORT FORM
Nominees:
Doctor Who: "The Next Doctor" Written by Russell T Davies; Directed by Andy Goddard (BBC Wales)
Doctor Who: "Planet of the Dead" Written by Russell T Davies & Gareth Roberts; Directed by James Strong (BBC Wales)
Doctor Who: "The Waters of Mars" Written by Russell T Davies & Phil Ford; Directed by Graeme Harper (BBC Wales)
Dollhouse: "Epitaph 1" Story by Joss Whedon; Written by Maurissa Tancharoen & Jed Whedon; Directed by David Solomon (Mutant Enemy)
FlashForward: "No More Good Days" Written by Brannon Braga & David S. Goyer; Directed by David S. Goyer; based on the novel by Robert J. Sawyer (ABC)

Winner:
Doctor Who: "The Waters of Mars" Written by Russell T Davies & Phil Ford; Directed by Graeme Harper (BBC Wales)

Ahh.. Russell we meet again, Now for the past 4 years Doctor Who has won 3 of these awards, with it's run only being stopped by Dr Horrible's sing-along blog (coincidentally my dictionary tells me at Horrible's isn't a word and that I should replace it with Horribleness, which I didn't think was a word... fun fact!) and while this may make you think I am unfair on Russell T and that he must be good if he won all those awards? I would like to point out to you that all the episodes that won, The Empty Child / The Doctor Dances, The Girl in the Fireplace and Blink were all written by my geek love overlord Steven Moffat and that this is in fact the first Russell T episode to win one. And considering it was up against those other 2 DW episodes there must have been a real lack of competition, while Mars was generally good as it gave us an unhinged and bordering on megalomaniac Doctor, the other 2 were poor attempts at cashing in on people mood at a particular time of year.

So there you have it, my take on the two entries I actually know something about, If you want to know the other categories and nominees follow this link.

The Knifing: Arkham City

2010-09-05T06:10:00.000-07:00

New section time!!!

So yesterday I was having a night in and got a tad bored, so I sat down with my computer and came up with the insightful mess you see below... ENJOY!

5 things I learnt from: SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD

2010-09-01T03:46:00.000-07:00

Today I look at Scott Pilgrim, and what it has taught me.

1. Realistic relationships can work in movies

Scott Pilgrim tells the tale of an indy slacker who must defeat the 7 evil ex's of the new girl he is dating called Ramona Flowers. The thing that first struck me upon watching this movie was how well rounded the characters and their interactions were. Seriously, I want you to think about any other 'romantic comedy' that has come out this year... now movies like the Bounty Hunter and She's out of my League spring to mind.These films take perfect models of people and throw them together with the only dilemma between them being that they can't seem to work out that they should be together. Scott Pilgrim raises a massive single finger salute to this and makes it's main characters all flawed douches. Seriously, Scott Pilgrim starts with the titular character going out with a teenager in order to help get over the girl who dumped him a year ago, that is until someone better in Ms Flowers comes along and he drops the teen like a dog at the pound. Ramona herself isn't immune to massive amounts of douche bag behavior, with her constant dumping of boyfriends resulting in the league of ex's, and then never bothering to mention to Scott what hen is facing, Ramona is always looking out for herself. But isn't that so much closer to real life, relationships are never just about me loving you so very huggy much. We get into relationships because we think we need that role of a companion filled by someone, but in the end we'll always look after ourselves over others.

2. Micheal Cera will never play anything else well.

I have always like Micheal Cera, despite the fact that he does play the one role but I don't hold it against him because he does it well... Oh come on you know the one: The indy slacker who had a secret heart of gold, and tries for a relationship and would get one if the women could see how good he is for them. His role in this film is the same... but slightly different:The indy slacker who wishes he had a secret heart of gold, and tries for a relationship and would get one if he was less of an emotional hurricane and a douche bag. However this is all irrelevant as I already knew this before I saw the film, so what did I learn? Well upon reflecting on Mr Cera's proformance I began to wonder whether he could become a true action hero or become one of those harmless or douchy characters in a drama, and I just couldn't see it, he is to humorous to be taken seriously in any Drama and he wouldn't work as an action hero because he is relate-able. What do I mean? Well in an action film we are looking at some one who is clever smart and built like a tank with legs, so rather than being relate-able they are more an idealised version of what we want to be. So here is my prediction, Michael Cera will get a few more miles out of his current stich and then spiral into cable comedy obscurity.

3. Edgar Wright is more than his resume has made out.

Okay so Edgar Wright may have been the director of Spaced, Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, but they are hardly genre defining social deconstructions. So for him to come out and bring us something that effortlessly mixes comics with video games with movies, is near unbelievable. I look forward to seeing what else he can do with the money he hopefully will get to make more films like this.

4. People gets me!

I'll keep this short, This movies is like a long protracted look into the inner most depths of my psyche and I would bet many other geeks as well.

5. Canada beats America

I would like to draw everyone's attention to something, 2 of the Exs in the film are played by Chris Evans and Brandon Routh, who play Marvel's Captain America and DC's Superman respectively. So by a contrived drawing of my extremly long bow, Scott Pilgrim is the best superhero of all time, beating both Marvel and DC's big guns.

Question: What other Graphic Novels do you want to see made into films? Or re-made like this?

What the hell happened to you?

2010-08-29T06:58:00.000-07:00

You know right about now I'm feeling like a fight club resident. For some time I got away, put some perspective on myself and got ahead in the real world... then fast growing bored of the real world found myself wandering back to where I began

...

Poetic I guess?

Anyway you heard right folks I'm back... again! So aside from some structural difference expect absolutely nothing to change from last time, this is the same pure unadulterated geekyness that was here before, just reheated and served for your pleasure. So enjoy!

Kinect

2010-07-20T06:41:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry but who are you people and what are you doing on my screen? Yes the trailers
from E3 for kinect have been released to the general public and they look like something'
a disgruntled ex-ad chief from Nintendo would have come up with trying to display a cross
section of society with the decent looking chick, the asian chick, the dorky looking man,
the cute chick, your dad, blondy, geek, another woman and Blondy again. I get it Kinect
is supposed to appeal to everyone on the family friendly specturm, stop beating me with
it. But then it only gets worse as we are introduced to a small child, here playing the
obligitory black section of society and her happy family who are playing with the first
game kinectimals. Not only does this game look odd as you replace domestic anmals with
cute man eating monsters but it appears to suffer from what I will call the Nintendogs
problem, where for about a week or so you will happily play with your animal treating
them as a beloved pet until you grow bored and move onto another and immensly more fun
game. Seriously the reason we keep pets past the 'cute stage' is because we can't ignore
them, they piss on the furniture eat our food and ruin things if we don't look after them,
here there is no such reason to care. Then we come to the TV aspect of he kinect, where it
allows you to watch ESPN and other channels on the xbox and control it with your voice...
Why the hell do I want to do that, if I want something like that I'll just buy Foxtel, not
only do I get more channels but I also don't have to pay as much for the experience.
Although I must say that at least for the feel of living in the future having the voice
controls appears interesting. I'd like to tackle the dance games next, this is the one
thing that appears good for this glorified controler, If it can acuratly desipher my
moves then this will work well and allow for the freestyleing Dance Dance revolution never
has. Okay up next are the sport games, honestly I don't see this as winning any fans
because frankly Xbox if they weren't sucked in by the Wii then they won't be sucked in by
you. Now try and explain to me why I want to stand there looking like more of a tool than I do
with the wii wheel attachments. seriously, someone send me an email or leave a comment
telling me why. But I guess that's pointless anyway because if families will get sold by
the cute tiger they'll be buying these sport games to further justify the devices price.
And then we're back to the people again. but there is nothing there that will sell a
hardcore gamer on the virtues of kinect and even when Fable 3 comes out with its
components it may only gain the idea more of a beating as gamers are unable to avoid it.
But to paraphrase a political leader one day we will all just have to begin moving
forward from these motion controls.

Mad Thought: Brain Wave

2010-07-18T23:59:00.000-07:00

So I was bored... here is the result:

Game of the Week

2010-07-17T20:55:00.000-07:00

The game of this week is Exit Path, a running jumpy game where you avoid rotating death traps as you traverse the many levels. Despite all the levels having a very Portal feel to them this game was quite fun to play, if short, and I would recommend it as a basic time killer:

What If God Of War was made into an Indie Film?

2010-07-15T23:42:00.001-07:00

Let us Begin the Campain Trail

2010-07-14T17:57:00.000-07:00

During the week Edward Norton and Marvel seemed to have fallen out of touch, leaving Marvel to recast the role of the Hulk. Current rumours are that Joaquin Phoenix, Nathan Fillion and Adrian Brody are all in contention, but there is one name that is currently floating under the surface, David Tennant is also rumoured to be in contention.

I would like to make my position clear, I blamed RTD for any issues with the Tennant era series, David Tennant managed to somehow give heart to what should have been a meandering bit of fan gratification, he has the heart and intensity to carry the role of the Hulk, and there is this video of him getting into character:

So here is my campaign, I want everyone who would stand behind DT to put this logo at the bottom of their blog or on your facebook as a show of our power. Come On get involved:

The TARDIS teleports sideways and into your Wii

2010-07-13T06:22:00.000-07:00

So as most of the people who read this know I started my life as a Doctor Who blog before I became a general thoughts (with a bit of a film bias) blog, but occasionally I find a bit of information and decide it must be shared with the world.

That being said I read today that the BBC has decided that they will release a Doctor Who video game on the Wii since it is family friendly... Now guys I have no real problems with the Wii aside from its gimmicky nature, but seriously you are going for the cotton candy jelly-bean crowd? The Pandorica Opens ends with Amy and River dying, this is not a show just for children this is a show also for hardcore fans who write angry blog posts.

The game play its self is another thing that could prove dangerous. There have previously been games on the Commodore 64, ZX Spectrum, PC and the PlayStation 2 and I don't think there has ever been an unbridled success amongst them. As the BBC pointed out: "You can't have Doctor Who blowing things to bits with a laser gun. That would massively change the nature of the show." so doing it won't work for the fans and not doing it won't win over gamers. Although I can see how this will work on the Wii, we could have the Wii controller as sonic screwdriver in a point and click adventure where the Doctor is locked in a cage and we use it to control a robot to fight off other robots... best of both worlds right?

Oi! Thought you'd slip past me did you?

2010-07-12T06:57:00.000-07:00

Thats right lovers of all things random something has attempted to slip past you, another favorite of your childhood is going for a dip in the Live Action / CG pool but is hoping you don't notice. So who is up to the plate this time? Not another Alvin and the Chipmunks we hope... Thunder Cats? No... Casper? No but it is Hannah Barbera... Snaggle Puss? Pretty close.

Yogi bear is coming to your theatres December 17, 2010. No trailer has been released as of yet, which I do find strange considering most films of this kiddy nature choose to build the hype early in favour of a slow burn. Regardless there is a plot out:

Everyone's favorite pic-a-nic basket-stealing bear comes to the big screen in "Yogi Bear." Jellystone Park has been losing business, so greedy Mayor Brown decides to shut it down and sell the land. That means families will no longer be able to experience the natural beauty of the outdoors -- and, even worse, Yogi and Boo Boo will be tossed out of the only home they've ever known. Faced with his biggest challenge ever, Yogi must prove that he really is "smarter than the average bear" as he and Boo Boo join forces with their old nemesis Ranger Smith to find a way to save Jellystone Park from closing forever.

I am so sick and tired of these films coming in and trampling all over my childhood. A movie like this can only go two ways 1. They come up with a clever way of attracting business while they do some Furry Vengence style shananigans to the Mayor fellow or 2. hey do some Furry Vengence style shananigans to the Mayor fellow. Both fill me with a cold fear, but their is something else that could just ruin it more and that lies within the casting, Tom Cavanagh has been cast as Ranger Smith (meh it seems like the NPH casting in Smurfs, someone who has a good fan following), Anna Faris will play a nature documenter (this is the arbitrary love interest that all films seem to need to shoe horn in... not happy but I know I won't win this fight), Dan Akaroyd has been cast as the voice and motion capture actor of Yogi (Not too bad), and Justin Bloody Timberlake will voice/motion capture BooBoo (Que steam from ears).

As soon as I find a trailer it will go up. But don't let this movie just fly under the radar people force it to the surface for what it is.

Question: Who would you cast in this film for Yogi, BooBoo and Ranger Smith?

Who reads the papers anyway

2010-07-12T06:06:00.000-07:00

For this week I am up in Sydney participating in a Model United Nations, but another delegate directed me to this clip, from Yes, Prime Minister. I quite like this show it was always well scripted and very poignient. This clip talks about who reads British papers and is totally true:

5 things I learnt from: TOY STORY 3

2010-07-11T07:07:00.000-07:00

Thats right folks the thoughts are getting a staple, everyone needs something to make them stand out in the crowd even if it is just a funny hat, so here is how I will review things by looking at 5 things I learnt wether they be good bad or otherwise.

1. Animation is not just for kids

I know for some of you out there this isn't new information, movies like Shrek, last years monsters versus aliens and pretty much every Pixar movie up to now have featured some adult humor, but up until now it has more felt as though this was in place to amuse parents who had been dragged along by their toy loving screaming spawn, but Toy Story 3's overt humor really takes it to another level. Jokes about Ken's sexuality and even terms such as Lincoln logs are used with abandon, while sight gags like the tortilla head and flamenco dancing Buzz seem further removed. But that seems to have been done for a reason. Which moves me effortlessly into my next point.

2. Toy Story 3 was not made children of the 00's but the 90's

I know this may be easy to argue through the near incineration of the toys (oh did I not mention this is a spoiler filled review? Cause it is) but it was even before that when I came to this conclusion, the entire opening sequence is geared towards us, for any child entering the theatre who was born in the 00's they're watching some kid, whom they can assume is called Andy, playing with a bunch of toys. hurray. While for the 90's child it's our old buddy Andy and look there is Woody, Mr Potato head, Buzz, Jessie... the list just goes on and then we are casually informed that Bow Peep is gone, for any one who didn't grow up with the series that is like a throw away line, but for me it blew my mind. Woody was now all alone and that neat rift of sexual humor had disappeared.

3. Just because you expand an ensemble it doesn't mean that everyone becomes thinly spread

Taking movies like Batman & Robin, Spiderman 3 and Iron Man 2 (and ignoring the fact they are all superhero movies) we could deduce that films who increase their heroes and villains beyond the number 3 will inevitably become thinly spread and leave us unfulfilled with each character. This is something I have always belived this to be true, but not only did Toy Story 3 break that mould, it threw it in a fridge and shot a nuke at it! The thing is we know all the central characters of Toy Story 3 so that was never going to be the problem, but it was all these new characters, such as Bookworm, Big Baby, Mr. Pricklepants and the Monkey, that we needed to learn about that was going to be a challenge. But they were all developed, even if it was for a moment, to a point where I can describe them; Bookworm is a social defunct who enjoys his time in the company of books and looks down his nose at people; Big Baby is an individual who is easily controlled by Lotso but still cares for people to much and is really good at heart, Mr Pricklepants is a thespian who takes himself all to seriously but again has a heart of gold and the monkey is a dumb individual who will do what the person in power tells him.

4. No one will ever best Pixar

This lesson was one that I had nearly learnt in Up but was only truly hammered home in this film. Pixar will forever reign as one of the top studios in Animation comedy for one simple reason, they are not afraid to make you cry. In Up Pixar came out and but the massive amount of balls they had on the table at the start, we got to see a montage of one mans happy life leading up to his wife's death. I know people who were brought to tears by that, and here they do it again having all the toys sadly accept the fact that they are about to die and you can't help but feel that this is the end even as you dimly remind yourself that a happy ending was promised you still get this terrible niggling feeling that it may all be a lie and that these wonderful friends of yours are about to bite the big one. Now I hear some of you asking but this is supposed to be a happy film how does immense drama put it above others? Well quite simply it makes those funny moments more poignant, LGM's using 'the claw' is a running gag the last time it gets dragged out should only elicit a giggle, but put it next to instant death and you'll get a full belly laugh of relief from me.

5. You can draw any points from Pixar films

Okay so I got this from reviews after the film which goes against what I set out to do but shut up its my blog and I'll do what I like. Anyway so something that every reviewer seems to enjoy banging on about is how you can draw death metaphors from Toy Story and there are latent homosexual themes living in the character of Ken. But I don't think they are digging far enough, there are so many other juicy parallels you can make for this film. The first one I thought of was Marxist theory. Where Lotso portrays the Tsar Nicholas, the Butterfly room occupants are the Bourgeoisie and the Caterpillar room are the repressed working class. All continues with its oppression until the intellectuals arrive (here played by Andy's toys) and educate the people in how to rise up for themselves, and they do disposing of their leader and creating a land where people wear gold sparkly clothes and are groovy... Okay so the metaphor slides off at the end there but you get my drift.

Question: What other themes or ideas can you draw out of Toy Story 3? They could be as loose and thin as you like.

So thats it the first of what will be a number of reviews of anything I can find, movies, video games and other stuff.

Hope it was enjoyable.

Free game of the week: Super Mario Bros. Crossover

2010-07-10T16:47:00.000-07:00

Okay so during the week I found this game floating around the interwebs, it is basically the original Mario game but you can now play with other iconic SNES characters such as Link, Samus and Megaman. You could play with other characters but they are so obscure and useless that it isn't worth it. Still its a fun little time killer and I recommend it.

Pac-Man: The TV Series

2010-07-09T07:45:00.000-07:00

According to Namco Bandai's Japanese Website Marvel exec Avi Arad is developing a Pac Man TV Series for release in 2012. The series will be set in the 21st century (because obviously everything is better if we modernize it) and will feature Pac Man as a high schooler who must save the world with the help of his ghost friends; Inky, Blinky, Pinky and Clyde.

Why oh why do we need to do this to Pac Man? The original game was simple, you were a yellow ball that ate things and the ghosts chased you. So how does that equate to you being friends with the enemy, being in high school and saving the world? Well Avi Arad had this to say:

“We wanted to keep Pac-Man the same lovable guy he has always been, but (put him) in the 21st century, we (also) wanted to talk about real stories and … see how they can relate to our lives, being in high school and being a teenager. At the end of the day, it’s the story of a reluctant hero.”

... If you want to tell a story about a teenager who is a reluctant hero why don't we tackle some other property where these parallels would make sense, such as... Oh I don't know... Spiderman??

Although trying to move Pac man from the interactive media of a video game to any sit and watch media has never really been an unbridled success. The original TV series stunk of a bad smurfs copy, it revolved around Pac man and his extended family (here playing the role of the smurfs) fighting off Mezmaron (here playing Gargamal) and his henchmen the ghosts (as Azreal). The show didn't last more than 2 seasons (which isn't something to be proud of when you're being run by Hannah Barbera).

Is it so hard to find simple ideas for a feasible Pac-Man movie/TV series. I say it isn't and present you today with 3 ideas to bring us the Pac man movie we deserve:

1. GHOSTS

It is half past the future and a mad genius working for the government has managed to create a creature whose blood has lead to a cure for cancer and other diseases, but as usual the creature has become self aware and broken free killing everyone inside the underground bunker. A group of 4 soldiers known as GHOSTS are dropped in to search for survivors and recover research notes which would allow the authorities to recreate this experiment. It would be a tense thriller as the GHOSTS become the prey in this labyrinth.

2.ARCADIA

In the present day arcade video games are slowly losing their war against the consoles, the Arcadia generals learn of more troops joining their enemies as remakes of their former selves everyday. Sealed away from the end of the war in the a time locked space invader ship Pac man, Frogger and an entity known only as PONG-ball reawaken to find themselves in a Dystopian world where FPS's have crushed everyone's free will and ground all video games into a constant state of boring. it is now up to our rag tag bunch of heroes to build and lead a glorious rebellion to victory.

3.A Pac Knight

In the far distant past, Pac man a brave warrior from the future has been teleported back by mediocre wizard Murray (younger brother of Merlin (obvious joke haha)) to save a bandit who has been kidnapped by a princess, in what will be a HILARIOUS role reversal. So using the magical power of the pellets Pac Man sets out to complete this task.

Scott Pilgrim will be defeating your favorite super heroes this August

2010-07-08T01:10:00.000-07:00

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World will be coming to cinemas this August.

I did find it amusing when someone pointed out to me that Chris Evans (who will be playing Captain America ) and Brandon Routh (who played Superman) will both be evil exes in this film. So by simple super heroes math Scott Pilgrim beats both Marvel and DC's best characters.

Doctor WTF

2010-07-07T01:22:00.001-07:00

Okay as much as I loved beating the stuffing out of Russell T Davis last week it turns out, unsurprisingly, that there will be no Johnny Depp led Doctor Who American movie. As much as this news warms my heart it does set me off on a train of thought as to what an American Doctor Who movie would look like???

Well after some thought I have come up with what I would expect:

Lindsay Adams (Megan Fox) is a large-chested and rich socialite who seems to have it all, until the day she meets Doctor Who (Johnny Depp) a rough and tumbled alien scientist on the run from his own planet of time-travelling authoritarians who want to kill him for just being to awesome.

[side note he will introduce himself as Who?... Doctor Who!]

But now a mysterious entity known only as Master Evil (Arnold Schwarzenegger), along with his comical and bumbling assistants known as the Daleks (Tommy Wiseau), is trying to alter the fabric of time as we know it, by blowing up some arbitrary Macguffin. With time running out Lindsay and Doctor must race against every clock in order to heal time. But how do you heal what is in flux?

From visionary Director Micheal Bay (Transformers) and Executive Producer Uwe Boll (Alone in the Dark) comes this summers most magical adventure.

DOCTOR WHO
AND HIS MAGICAL TIME AND RELATIVE DIMENSIONS IN SPACE MACHINE

I think I should become a screen writer.

Twi-nightmare

2010-07-01T02:59:00.000-07:00

Okay okay, before I sink my teeth into Twilight (haha its a pun) I would like to preface this with the fact that I have not seen and might never see any of the Twilights so this is just for the purpose of point out how ridiculious the whole Twi-fad is.

So incase anyone didn't notice the high pitch squeels going off from cinemas around the country at midnight last night, the third movie in the Twilight Saga was released, now as I've already pointed out I have not seen it and my only contact with this seires is through reading the first book, which wasn't terrible I must admit, but does not deserve a place at the top of bestseller lists.

So what is this third installment of the Saga of Angsty Bitch and Lord Sparkle-Britches about? Well according to credible review site Rotten Asparagus (May or may not be something taken from Rotten Tomatoes I have edited):

As Seattle is wierded out by a whole bunch of 'hot' teenagers going missing (Cause no one over 20 and ugly can be a vampire) and a character with a motivation as thin as a rice crispees wafer continues her quest for revenge by, rather than sneaking in and breaking some necks, builds a giant army which manages to scream 'Hello we're here to kill you, but don't come and fight us though cause then all our plans will turn to shit', Queen Frowns-a-lot once again finds herself surrounded by Heroin adicts and people with magically disappearing shirts. In the midst of it all, she is forced to choose between her Blind and wierd devotion for the sparkling fag and her the other kid who she only keeps around for a bit of a peep show - knowing that her decision is balatantly obious to everyone watching and that the likelyhodd of this maguffin threat of war is as small as Robert Pattersons whoopsie. With her graduation quickly approaching for no other reason than to give the plot some pace, you the viewer has a choice to make, walk out and take medicments to forget the horrors you eyes have seen or take a power saw to your temple . But which is which?

So thats what I'm assuming most of us are missing out on, I know it sounds so good... Anyway I did want to respond to a fee comments I have found floating around the interwebs:

"I absolutely loved Eclipse. It was awesome. I haven't read the books so had no idea what to expect whcih made it extremely exciting."

Just because you read the source material the movie shouldn't be any less exciting, you should be going to see how your favourite actors translate the good bits from page to screen

"Watched all three last night - have had only 3 hours sleep but couldn't care less"

Ladies and Genltemen I present you with a torture method to replace waterboarding

"I'm still on a high and can't wait to watch it again. Now the countdown begins for the next instalment."

Apparently the next film will be out next year in July, so it is more than a year away. Thats the one thing I don't get from these fans it is as though there is nothing eles in the world for them to do than giggle and scream whenever some thing about twilight comes in. I may be waiting for Scott Pilgrim but atleast I devote equal time to Toy Story, Kick ass and Iron Man 2

"As for which team I am on - have to admit I'm torn between them both."

Look I need someone to explain this to me, what is the point of having a bloody team when there is no contest, there was a whole film setting uo the fact that the stoney that sparkles is the main romance/pedophile interest and even in the book that was meant to bring the shirtless dance troop in as a threat to those feelings we were still having a bit of a cry over the other guy.

"Eclipse is the most anticipated film of the year"

Okay look, yes there are a lot of young and desperate girls who want to see people with tops off and a sparkling Crack adict, but there are plenty of other movies that people are anticipating, such as Toy Story 3, I've been waiting 11 bloody years for that movie so you can't tell me the anticipation hasn't risen above the hight of the empire state building.

"They tried to make the movie more suitable for everyone .i.e. Action, love, comedy, instead of serious like the tone of the book."

I dare anyone to go look up the trailer and tell me this is an evenly spread movie, there is more than 90% spent pummling home that fact that there is a love triangle... although the two dudes don't love each other so it is more of a V.... and the chick dosen't love one of the guys so it is more like a love line with a small thread hanging off. But still trying to shoe-horn in some action scenes to widen your audience is kinda tacky, the action crowd won't go cause they know this is a shitty love story no matter how you try and dress it, and you're fan base will be let down by those scenes because it isn't what they came to see.

So what am I trying to say here... well I guess it is that I don't have any feelings for twilight and probably never will, since the movie could be acuratly simulated by dousing one guy in a pool of glitter, telling a girl never to smile and getting a fury man to walk around with his top off. But I do hope this continues like it is for the next 2 years because it always gives me something to bitch about

THE APPOCOLYPSE IS NEIGH!!! REPENT YE FOUL SINNER!!!!

2010-06-30T05:39:00.000-07:00

There are dark forces swirling around the mighty Doctor, after his encounter with the Pandorica the doctor has found himself faceing a nemisis of old with a new lacky who once more wishes to bring him to his knees.

An internet source is claiming that Johnny Depp has been signed on to play the Doctor in a movie version of the brilliant BBC series in a script penned by the foul infamous beast who was the real enemy of the doctor in "The End Of Time"... Russell T Davies.

Look he is EVIL!!!

The likleyhood that anyone could sit down after being brought up to speed on the Doctor and the current boon with the new era of our holy lord Moffat and think that this would be a good idea is so infantesimly samll that I would encourage everyone to get together, build a rocket, fly to a planet made entirely out of salt, find 10 identical planets and then use this salt along side the rumor

Although this does give me enough things to start my list, thats right a hate this is basically for any tiny scrap of information you find on these peoples/comapies wrong doings, let me know and a small head smashing will follow as well as a threat

The threat for today: If this does go ahead I will go to Hollywood with a grip that will hold peoples eyes open and the Season 3 Finale of DW on DVD and force the Producer to watch it continuaisly for 5 days, If he can then provide me with a reason why this project cannot fail, then I will be like a captin of a ship before he sends it off to traverse the sea.

... Savagly hit him with a champagne bottle.

Night all

The realisation of the 'Attack of the Clones' potential

2010-06-12T06:47:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry I was cruel to your last trailer FU2, you do seem to have been doing stuff.

I realise the connection

2010-06-11T05:14:00.000-07:00

So over the past couple of days there have been two pieces of information that have caught my eye.

The first is that a new Indiana jones movie is being made to futher sully my memory of the once mighty series, it seems to be a running theme with Lucus that if he was involved in something in his begeinnings it would be awesome, but now if he's involved in things in his old age it is less so, see the Star Wars prequels (I didn't hate them, but they still don't hold a candel to the originals). As long as they go back to the original format of looking for relegious articles then I'll be happy. Also Mutt should be fired out of a cannon... into a wall.

Micheal "must die" Bay, has come out and dropped a bombshell... He thought Transexuals 2 was 'flawed'. I honestly don't know what he means, I didn't find anything wrong with it.

More seriously, he has managed to drop a bit of the plot, it will involve the space race with the major villain being Shockwave. Its nice to see some middle ground enemies coming back into this farce of a trilogy, maybe Shockwave can add that serious edge he's been talking about. There will also be no 'dodgy humor' thank the lord Spaghetti monster on high, if there was one thing I hated more than the entire plot, actors and Micheal Bay himself it was the hash brownies and the dog sex scenes, Sam's 'happy time' was amusing the first time round as a small subtle scene, the second film to hit us over the head with it, as in "look, look, look, it's comedy in a serious movie, how original are we!". The final bit that the movie will be based around the space race if the cold war, does send a shiver down my sping. Get it Shiver, cold war??? Meh. When you play god with history, the success of the piece is very much dependant on wether the audience agrees it is plausible and is with you all the way. Considering the last bowl of droppings we were fed last time, I doubt people will buy his links.

Now what was the link? Shia La Bouf is in both movies, so I put it to you is Shia a franchise killer?

I'm going to reserve judgement until I see Wall Street 2, but then its open slather.

Ads from the 80's

2010-06-09T05:30:00.000-07:00

So I was bumming around on Youtube, as you do, and I stumbled across these old ads for resteraunts. Isn't it weird how times change?

Doctor Who adventure game

2010-06-07T06:01:00.000-07:00

So after spending Friday throwing darts into my most hated dartboard, a little board covered with pictures of groups I hate such as Fox and Micheal Bay, I was suprised to find that the Doctor Who adventure game thing that I'd hear about sometime ago had been released. Hooray! I thought to myself someone has had the brains to mix together three of my favourite things, Doctor Who, Video Games and Steven Moffat. So lets delve through the mirk of what should have been an easy to hit love fest for me.

Downloading
Right so I woke up at about 8 am on Saturday morning, ready to sonic some screws and exterminate some Daleks, only to find the game was still downloading 8 hours after I started and proceeded to go until noon... okay not a great start. So finally having the download complete I was ready to install and get going, only to have th game tell me, "Woopsy you don't seem to be contected to the internet, do you want to fix that and try again later?" This was despite the fact I was chating on Facebook at the same time. So after hiting my computer for an hour I moved down to the desktop and finally got it working

Story
So it opens up with the Doctor and Amy heading to 1963 to go and watch the Beatles, only to find that the Daleks have completly changed the course of history and taken over the earth, so its a quick trip back to the Dalek home of Kaalann on Skaro, along the way we run into:
- A lady with an ace-esque explosion fetish
- A dissapearing Amy, ala Back to the Future
- Varga Plants
- The Emperor Dalek and his colourful friends

In all the story was actually quite good, drawing on the old and the new it blended quite well and I found myself interested in how they would make sense of what they had done, which seems to be a staple of this Moffat era. But another staple was also present in the form of the homage, now I know that Moffat is, like me, a massive Whovian geek but do I have to have this fact launched at me like a midgit in a cannon every 20 minutes? As well as that aspects like the Varga plants felt like they'd just been thrown into the plot cause we needed to make the game harder as it went on, but I guess thats more of a gameplay thing than a story aspect

Gameplay
Okay now I've said very nice things about the story so I think its about time I said some mean things. God the general game aspect of this thing was atrocious, about every 5 minutes in the first half an hour I found my self pressing ctr-alt-del, just to give the game a quick defribulator to the chest and get it moving again, however once it really got going these problems seemed to slowly disappear, only to reappear in the last few minutes and remind me how pissed it got me. Now I'm sure you could tell me it was just my computer, but I've played Crysis on this thing and not had a problem so I don't see why this game, which is for all asthetic purposes like sticking a sheet on some manekins and having them run around, while it may look okay it just doesn't feel as natural as real DW or even other games. But even when I was moving around it was like trying to move a mouse covered in grease that was stuck to the floor with honey, it can be done but you'll piss around for ages trying to work it out. I think my whole feeling for the gameplay can be compounded into my final 15 minutes of playing, as the Doctor I had just finished setting of a final trap and all I had to do was run through a short maze and up a ramp to amy within the time limit, and once I'd worked out where to go it should have been easy. But whenever I wanted to move away from the death dealing shooty walls my mouse seemed to think it would be hilarious to screw with me and run right into them, fantastic.

Other Things I'd Like To Say
There are actually a few other things I'd like to rave about, first Nick Briggs I love you, there is something about your Daleks which is just haunting and wonderful at the same time. Also whatever I read about this being a point and click adventure game has lied to me, this whole thing is actually one of those small kiddie games where we run around learning about stuff and beating the bad guys, like a dumb version of those Carmen San Diego video games we played as children, but that also depresses me if this is the level of people they consider t be playing these games. And finally, the red Daleks are not scary.

Conclusion
So what can I really say about this game, well while I quite enjoyed watching the Doctor run around, and as gratifying as it was to kill Amy a couple of time for hilarity value, these things don't out way the massive problems I had with the general game controls, so for this whole thing I think I would rather have seen the gameplay budget spent on upgrading the visuals a bit and just having them make an animation, it would have taken less time for me and it may have even enjoyed it more.

Yes indeed Its time to rhyme, the cake was a lie, now Bay must die.

2010-06-02T08:53:00.000-07:00

Okay so it was just about a week ago after my mysterious reserection that I posted the ruomor that Micheal 'my explosions bigger than your explosion' Bay was planning to cast a Victoria Secrets, model with all the acting experience of one of those lamps that sit in a shop windows, in his next Transformers ... I hesitate to call it a film... spectical. At the time the possibility that any one man could be so thick not to realise that this was one of those ideas, like a tennis racket made out of pancakes, you put in the BAD pile was unfathomable to me, but apparently they do exist and Mr Bay ocupies their ranks. It's not that I have anything wrong to having a bit of eye candy go with my movies, actresses that can do the both is fine with me. But when you cast someone whose job is to just walk around in skimpy clothes, well all attempts at subtlty go out the window.

After the Trash pile that was Transf~~estites~~ormers 2 and the absolute spanking Bay got from critics and general film goers alike, I honestly though he might have decided to make a move in the smarter direction, but of course that dream was short lived.

Now I know that out there somewhere there will be people trying to tell me, 'Oh come on Gent, it won't be that bad. At least they aren't trying to pretend shes an actress anymore, and look at all the changes Bays making, surely that is a good move?' and to that I say, shut up and go back to the fan boy hole you crawled out of, just because you tinker with the formula of a terrible film doesn't mean it will get better, infact if you push it the wrong way it will only get worse. So which way will this monstrosity that is Transiberian 3 fall, well lets look at 2 core aspects that are pissing me up the wall.

Those that have left us:
So who is still sitting on the Transmogrify Ship and who hass walked the plank or managed to sneak off in a Life boat before the whole thing comes down? Well Bay's is still there obviously, and he still seems to think he is a real diector who can build a movie and is a master of tension. HEY GENIUS! Running through the desert for the last hour of the film doesn't build tension, it just makes me hope the Clash of the Titans Scorpions will pop out and end my misery, and just cause I wanted to shoehorn this complaint in somewhere, a film should build up to the final climactic showdown with your villian, wether it is a Lightsaber duel with mindfreaking implications, or a hostage negotionation it should be the highlight, not go for two seconds as our super powered hero beats on a senior citizen, geez. Okay what was I tlaking about? Next, 2 executive producers have bitten the big one, Brian Goldner and Mark Vahradian. I'm sorry guys but your loss is of no effect to me, when you only lose 2 out of 8 producers, I doubt we'll feel the difference, especially when Steven 'Holier than thou' Speilberg is still there. The writing was the most obvious problem in the second film so when I see that Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman have left the franchise for fear of it 'going stale' massive warning bells begin to go off like im standing in the middle of Nostre Dame Cathedral at 12 o'clock. Orci and Kurtzman were the writers of the first Transfixers and while it didn't set the world on fire I could hardly call it bad, but rather than letting those two settle back down to work as they went before, some genius decided that another writer would make it even better, like some sort of wierd 2+1=better senario. The man who we got was Ehren Kruger, and while he did a good job with The Ring, he proved here and in The Ring Two (what an inventive name for a sequel) that while he can set stuff up in an original, he has a random need to dig plot holes in a sequel.

The Batman Effect
Okay so you're movie isn't working, people were dissapointed in it and you're losing your fan boy audience. While any Berk with a keyboard (like me) would tell you that you need to go back to basics, respect the fans of the source and not run over pre-existing cannon with a steamroller. OR, as Mr Bay seems to think, you could always go with what I like to call the Batman effect. The Batman effect is a very simple thing to do, but if done incorrectly it will drag your franchise to the brink of destuction. The effect is that you make your movie darker and it is ultimatly better, such as Dark Knight and Watchmen. This however doesn't always work, take Wolverine: Origins for example, while they tried to darken it up a bit the entire movie still felt as campy as when Wolvy was running around in the yellow spandex. And if the enternal badass Wolverine can't pull it off then I don't see how Transistor Radio 3 will do it.

Okay so thats the basics for why this movie will suck. Now for all you people out there who actually agree with me, oh come on I know you're there, I putting together a Special team with special privilages (Oh god, now I've got Wolfman: Original stuck in my head) so grab you're Pitchforks as we strom Paramount Studios to stop this movie. Any of you out there that still need your fix of Transformationalists, my advice is to open 4 internet browsers, on one have google images robots, another have explosions, the third he women draped over cars and on the fourth start the movie Eagle Eye, now switch randomly between the tow, trust me you won't notice the difference.

Scott Pilgrim Trailer 2

2010-06-01T22:58:00.000-07:00

I'm quite looking forward to this, the mix between movies and video games and comics, and any other geeky thing you care to mention.

Dipping your childhood in sugar and the scent of babies

2010-05-31T23:53:00.000-07:00

Does anyone remember Grease? I know it is a stupid question for almost anyone who doesn't live under a musical/movie rock, but for those butch men and women who wouldn't be caught dead fraternizing with suck stuff (If this is you, why the hell are you here anyway?). Grease is the original High School Musical, as is clearly pointed out in the trailer, except where HSM has ditsy teenagers, a cutesy plot line and the most controversial we got was a slightly angst song. Grease, while being a spiritual predecessor, was ready to flaunt social lines just that little bit more, there were teen pregnancies, high school drop outs and drag races. To be slightly knit picky I could point out that the 18 year old leads in Grease were actually 24 (Trovolta) and 30 (Newton-John), but there was no cotton candy gumdrops in sight, and that was what made it that little bit better for me, it was realistic and didn't cause me to feel as though there should have been a compulsory gender swap at the door.

This trailer is an absolute sell out, covering this movie with colorful text and rainbow imagery makes me want to douse my computer in gasoline. Why do we have to sell out on the past these days, if it isn't a reboot or a remake its a 're-imaging' they're finding some new way to ram something they found in the discount bin of a video store. If I want to have a sing-a-long I'll get a Karaoke video, some alcohol and 3 other mentally deficient friends over to wail like dying seals, there would be no reason for me to want to congregate with more people than that to embarrass ourselves. Or maybe you would, I don't know, I can't tell you how to think..

In short, I hate cotton candy things (HMS, The adventures of lord Sparklepants, a.k.a. Twilight and the Jonas brothers to name a few), and big companies will always sell out on things that once were great.

Force Unleashed 2 - Subject 11729564718 (or the mysterious loop hole that brings us back for the sequel)

2010-05-31T08:15:00.000-07:00

So aside from being interested in most things in the geekdom world, I like video games. Now while I will agree that there were obvious problems with the first Force Unleashed, the stroy and development were quite good, and thats what I look for in games.

Now onto the trailer:
What the hell was that? Honestly the first trailer had a sort of suspence and intrigue to it. How is he alive? What are Yoda and Vader up to? And my personal favourite, Oh F@#K, what is the big Rankor killing thing. This trailer looked like something a fan with too much spare time on his hands had thrown together in order to amuse his friends. The end is just the gameplay pictures that were released sometime over a week ago, thats when I found them. The other main problem with this trailer is the whole centre flashback part, honestly it felt like going over to aunt Beryls to relive the memories of last Christmas where uncle roger got his name sake caught in his fly, while I enjoyed it at the time I don't need to be reminded cause those images will always be there., and even when we get past the clip show and two what is the only small section of new animation I could find it begins to look strangly familiar... oh wait:

Trailer

Website

So in short, I've found no discernable use for this trailer other than to use it to fill the void between people on facebook replying to wall posts, thanks for nothing Mr Lucus.

Continuity

2010-05-28T07:21:00.000-07:00

This video is hilarious, and quite true. While I did enjoy Iron Man 2, the fact that about half the movie was about setting up/promoting the universe.

Still... Sing it angain Iron Man

DC Flash Mob

2010-05-27T05:15:00.000-07:00

A DC Flash Mob has been organised for Federation Square this Saturday, so anyone who is interested, grab your tights and come on down. The day will begin at 9AM.

Posse up: We're going after Micheal Bay

2010-05-26T02:13:00.000-07:00

Dear all Ladies and Gentlemen,
On this day, my hopes have been betrayed. On this day the chances we had of a decent Transformers movie were dashed. On this day Micheal Bay showed his true colours.

I hated Transformers 2, I thought it was a god awful move that only managed to be half decent in its explosions (and there were so many of them that if Mr Bay hadn't gotten them right at some point it would just prove how retared he truely is). The thing which I was the most critical of in it was the utter and abhorent lack of plot, Oh sure there was some flimsy thrown together thing about some shard of the ginat Rubix cube, Emporer Palpatine and the *ahem* 'leads' spending what we must consider the second half of the film running through dunes of sand.

So pardon me whan I say I was really excited to hear they had gotten rid of Megan 'zoom in on her breasts' Fox. Had Micheal Bay finaly worked it out that plot is important? Would we get a real actor? Can I dare to dream that this movie may be good? We've already been promised it would be dark, so is this a step in the right direction?

Well my preties my hopes were momentarily dashed. I was told that a Victoria Secrets Model will replace Ms Fox.

...

YOU HAVE LEARNT NOTHING BAY!!!!
The point behind a movie is to suspend belief and bring to us a story of something which we may (or will) never experience, not to just throw some explosions, robots and hot women on a screen an pray that we don't notice everything else has been locked inside a box and shipped off to Bolivia

So here is my call to people of the internet, If Bay chooses a model I'm inviting you all to grab your shotguns and pichforks and join me as I ride out to Hollywood to take down Mr Bay. If its an actress.... well... we can all have cake.

Return from the Dead

2010-05-25T22:47:00.000-07:00

That's right I'm back from what looked like a fast end, but no I'm still here.

Now you may be wondering what happened to me? Well feel free to select what you find the most believable answer from the list below:

1. Got busy with work and as such so had no time

2. My computer died so I couldn't post

3. My dog ate my blog and only now has it come out the other side

4. The government closed me down and had me in a secret facility to stop my spreading of dangerous truths. I escaped using a mix of Kung Foo and Origami.

5. I died, went to heaven, fought in a war between heaven and hell, killed Satan, got to chose whatever I liked as a reward, got reserected and now am back.

So feel free to chose any of those options above to help you understand. So now that I'm back there will be a little bit of... fine tuning going on, as much as I enjoy DW, I never really wanted or planed on this becoming a blog exclusively on that. This is for my own random thoughts, observations and general stuff that interests me and may interest you.

So the long and short of it is: I'm back for any number of reasons, I'll be moving more into a random thoughts sort of writing and everyone can have a hug from these two:

Caio Me amigos.

Review

2010-04-24T19:28:00.000-07:00

When I wrote my first piece on Doctor Who, I said that this would be a big Welcome bacm angels episode, however now I don't think I did them justice, so here it is again

WELCOME BACK TO THE BIGGEST INTERGALACTIC BADASSES IN THE UNIVERSE! DON'T BLINK!

This is the Moffat we know and love, the intricate plot maker who can keep you on the edge of you seat and guessing until the very end, but lets jump straight in:

PLOT

This episode is Moffat to his absolute best. The pre-credit opening was amazing, The idea of sending a message through time to have The Doctor come back to where you sent it, how mind bending is that! I'm going to address the weeping angels later in the ep, but I will state now that they were absolutly scary, especially during the scene in that trailer with the image. The only thing that I did pick up on was that they opace seemed much slower than the last couple of episodes. Thats not a complaint by the way, This kind of timing could have aided last weeks episode. The cliffhanger, oh my god if any fan out there wasn't having a geek-gasm WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???? It was just so sublte the idea that statues were all angels, I mean who was even thinking about counting the heads? If the second episode is anything this one, then this'll become my favourite of all DW 2 parters.

THE DOCTOR AND AMY

For the past 3 episodes I have felt that we have either been focusing on one of The Doctor or Amy, The Doctor in the first, Amy in the second and The Doctor in the third. But this episode gave us the best look into both of them, The Doctor tthrough River and Amy through those terrifyingly tense scenes. I was listening to the DWO podcast, they mentioned something about Amy I liked, at the point in the episode when everyone is busy and River calls the Doctor over, Amy sarcastically asks "Anyone need me" and then walks off to amuse herself. If that had been any other companion she would have followed along with what the doctor was doing like a love sick puppy, Karen just brings a sense of equal to the companion role that we haven't seen in the new series before, yhea Donna coame close but she was annoying so she doesn't count. Another thing DWO pointed out was that this episdoe was one of the first ones they filmed, Could you tell? cause I couldn't Matt Smith was pitch perfect in his role, I got chills on the trap line, and his whole personality seemed more fleshed out than it did in the first set of episodes, maybe it was helped by the fact he had River to lead, but Matt still made his own imprint on the episode.

RIVER SONG

Normally I give this section to all of the Secondary Characters, but I feel that the other characters, while present and sutiably strong, were more fodda for The Doctors interactions with River. So here we are with Ms Song, Has there ever been such a complex and intriguing relationship between a Doctor and a companion? Is she his wife? Is she the Rani? Is she the Doctor? Is she a time thief who has stole the real River Song's diary and is now abusing what she knows of old Gallirayan society to manipulate The Doctor? Who knows, but Moffat is definently good enough to keep us guessing. My only real complaint is the Spoilers line, I don't know why, but it annoyed me, still it was good that they didn't dwel on the whole diary and spoilers thing. I've never really watched Alex Kingston, but she brings this really light bubbly sort of feeling to hers and the Doctor's interactions, it's almost as though she knows better than him, which it seems she does. So while I hope we don't learn everything at the end of this 2 parter I would like to find out at least a little bit more to whet my appitite for the Season Finale

ALIEN / ENEMY OF THE WEEK

So here we are, how about them Angels? How scary were they? Everyone knew coming in that this episode would be compared to Blink, so I know when it came to the angels I had conflicting hopes. But Moffat changed what the angels were, giving us a new experience that we hadn't predicted. As the Doctor said, the first set we met were scavengers, barely surviving , they had to wait for people. Howe asy would it been to have had the angel slink around the tunnel picking off the crew one by one and ending up with Jsut the Doctor, Father and River left as Amy is thrust back trough time (this was my prediction). But the image section, the slowly changing of Amy from looking into its eyes, and the Army of angels underground, these are not the angels we knew and loved, these are dangerous and deadly badasses... Oh joy! I'm going to address a question not that I've heard from a few people, why did the angel in the tunnel snap those soliders necks. When Angel Bob was talking to The Doctor he talked about how the Angel needed the Ceribral Cortex and the voice box to comunicate with the Doctor, however why the angel needs to speak with the Doctor remains to be seen. But what if an angel can lie, what if the angel we have seen in the bottem of the maze of the dead isn't the one in the spaceship. These angels must have been trapped in that maze, else they would have gone after the people nearby, so what if they needed the hull of the ship breached to get out? Scary

NEXT TIME

So the Doctor is under the pump to come up with a way to stop the angels, my suggestion would be to watch this episode again, the answer will be hidden in there somewhere. And Amy continues to struggle with the Angel's Curse (I like that name), the doctor tells her to keep her eyes closed, a backwards blink? And who knows what we find out about River.
I now feel justified, for this entire time I've been saying that the cracks can't be as simple as they seem, and now we find the Doctor is going to deal with one in this episode, so maybe they have no link to the finale, if this is true then what is the running Link, cause Moffat has said there is one (In Moffat we Trust).

Rating: 9.5/10

Favourite Quote:
The Doctor: "The writing. The graffiti. Old High Gallifreyan! The lost language of the Timelords. There were days - there were many days - these words could burn stars, and raise up empires, and topple gods."
Amy: "What does this say?"
The Doctor: "'Hello sweetie.'"

Merchandising!

2010-04-24T03:59:00.000-07:00

Thats right folks, got a DW itch that repeated watching of the episodes just won't scratch and tons of disposable income, then maybe you might like to be the new Series 5 merchandise avaliable.

See if you can guess what these are:

Yes it is a Dalek Toothbrush, I bet all those people who said the new Daleks were just a Merchendising opertunity are feeling pretty gratified now

These glow in the dark stickers seem pretty standard, but what does that small cresent moon (the one with X12) mean?

Yep, A DW bored Game. The thing I like about this one is thatit states it is like racing through time because you can flip the bored over... so If we flip a clock over.... Someone call NASA I've cracked time travel

Thats right it is a muhat thinks it is a TARDIS, well its in for a shock, because look what else we have:

Thats right, this mug is a tiny replica of the TARDIS, well aside from the bigger on the inside bit.

But thats not all folks, because I have an exclusive, yes right here before your every eyes I have the privilage to unvail 3 new posters promoting some new Doctor Who merchandise:

Everybody get your wallets open

DW Adventure Game: Back to the Skaro(Future)

2010-04-24T03:34:00.000-07:00

Yes thats right folks when I make a promise I come through on it... well except for that one time with the Biker chick and my Yeti room-mate.... I digress. So the synopsis for the first of these downloadable video games came out reccently and I must say I'm a little worried, here it is:

"The TARDIS materializes in 1963 - and London is in ruins. The Daleks have seized control of time and the only chance of saving Earth lies in a desperate quest to Skaro, the Daleks' home planet - before time catches up with Amy, the last survivor of the human race!"

Hmm... am I the only one who gest worried when we see that the Dalek's have taken control of time, I mean here is seems like they are using it as a simple plot device while the main plot is your mission, which I guess is fair in the context of a video game. I think something like this (if they had the budget) would have made a much better episode, you could have the Dalek's trick The Doctor, steal something from his Tardis and race off through time, The Doctor of course follows and then we move into the game plot.

And what about the games plot, well using the aformentioned synopsis and the trailer below, I've come up with some ideas:

1. We'll see a back to the future style thing were Amy begins to fade on Skaro
2. There is some fantastical device holding time in the place the Dalek's have chosen, which is what we are after.
3. At least the White Dalek will escape (Don't you agree that its about time we stoped with the whole 'Huzzah we have killed off all the Daleks and sealed a wormhole loop that will never ever ever ever ever ever be opened' when we all know that with the next season they'll all be back

So thats my brief take on the situation. The Doctor Who Adventuer Game: Back to the Future (Skaro Style) will be out on the 5th of June this year (or the 6th of May, I'm not sure how to read the date)

Clip Show: The Time of Angels

2010-04-23T06:48:00.000-07:00

Welcome to another week of clip show, and what have we got for you this time??? Well its our firast look at the big, everything that the Moff has done up to this point all dumped into one episode... clips.

I will point out that I'm actually really looking forward to this episode, but it still has the feeling that he came up with the idea for this episode before he even began writing the series opener, wether thats good or bad remains to be seen.

So here we go first clip:

2 things I want to say about this clip, firstly The Doctor acting like a spoilt child who has had his favourite toy taken off of him is kind funny here, but if it becomes something that recurs throughout the episode, it'll really grate on my nerves. Secondly, just putting it out there, this seems like the best proof we have that either River is,
a. A Time Lady (this seems unlikly as The Doctor has said that if there were any of his kind left he would be able to feel them, also I think that the Moff is above such a cheap trick)
b. The Doctor (Again unlikley as that would mean that the Doctor has an established death, also she genuinly sacrifices herself in the Library so I doubt this is right)
c. A Companion whose timeline we will follow backwards to the start (This seems most likley of all the predictions, but the likelyhood that the Doctor would tell River so much if this is the big reveal doesn't sit right)
d. Something that none of us have though of either becausde it is:
1. Too Bizzare
2. Staring us in the face

My money is on d.

I really hope spoilers doesn't become a catchphrase with River, it was kind of endeering in the Library but it wouls all to easily get on my nerves.

For anyone who (like me) thought that Moffat couldn't recapture that tense scary edge that Blink had, we were wrong. Even only vaguely watching this clip made me jump, something about those eyes are so creepy.

So thats the clip show for another week I'm going to put up one more Whovian thing before the review this week. With the synopsis of the first DW Adventure Game just released, I'm going to stick up some thoughts, and maybe even a possible plot

Spoilers!

1 true deadpool

2010-04-20T21:30:00.000-07:00

Over the past year and a half I have been intrigued, more so, by comic books. One of my favourite characters has to be deadpool (After reading Secret Invasion I was hooked). However I have to admit that after a year and a half he is beggining to grow stale in the comic books. That said, I stumbled upon this about a month ago and I have refallen in love with deadpool. This was the video brought me back:

Now while I found it funny it still didn't quite understand it, so I went back and watched the first episode:

I love this guy, If you want more then go here: ItsJustSomeRandomGuy, If you have the time, watch his hour series, starts with after hours, then happy hour and finally zero hour, the most recent one is brilliant

Review

2010-04-18T07:22:00.001-07:00

Or How to Depress a Dalek

This week delivered everything I ever wanted in a Doctor Who episode, an angry Doctor, actually scary Daleks and the Doctor using some sort of impossible object to save the day. I even enjoyed the most preposterous solution to a bomb ever. Also I have a new room-mate who would like to give its opinion, but let’s jump straight in:

PLOT

Well this week we were off to the time of the Second World War and the London Blitz, with the Doctor’s old friend Winne Churchill who has a brand new scheme to defeat the terrible Nazi menace, and their old friends of the Doctor, the Dalek’s but whatever could they be up to this time? In all honesty from the line old friends until this time could have been the description of the Dalek, Daleks in Manhattan and the Stolen Earth, so while I was interested to see what this new era would do with the Daleks, but I wasn’t jumping up and down about it (my room has a fan so that is inadvisable anyway). I really enjoyed the episode especially the whole subservient Daleks at the start was quite amusing, as was the whole set of scenes on the Dalek ship. There was just something about this episode that was engrossing, and as I previously stated I even liked the whole scene with the android Bracewell (Someone motioned to me that in this episode there was a Star Wars homage in the part where the Daleks shoot off his hand and say ‘No, we created you’, much like ‘NO, I am your father’) I will admit it made no sense, but the pure emotion of the scene and of Bracewell (Bill Patterson) made me believe.

THE DOCTOR AND AMY

This episode was quite Amy light, so I’ll get her out of the way first, Amy continued to shine as one of the doctor’s most useful companions, working out all the clever things we expect from the Doctor. Now for the man of the episode, Matt Smith showed his full range of the Doctor traits, the absolute frustrated fury he had for the compliant Dalek, the calm brilliance that was on display when he held them for ransom (with a biscuit, I challenge you to find another TV hero who can confront his greatest enemy with only a biscuit?) and the absolute terror of the rebirth of his worst enemy. While I still feel bad after yesterday’s Tennant review, I think Mr Smith (if only his name was John) has so far been brilliant, and seems to be getting better.

SECONDARY CHARACTERS

Let’s start with Mr Churchill, the whole buddy-buddy thing that he had going on with The Doctor was really nice, I felt like it was two old friends having a catch up (the whole handshake over the TARDIS key was a nice touch). There are some people who think that Ian McNeice conveyed the insurmountable pressure that Winston was under very well. And then there was Bracewell.. I thought he was the most human character in the episode; the emotion on his face during the bomb defuesal was completely believable, basically I thought they were both much better than last week’s offering.

ALIEN/ENEMY OF THE WEEK

Well lets all have a big welcome back for the Daleks, while there has been a lot of Dalek overkill during the RTD era it was nice to see them back at their fearsome best, with a new design and paint-job too. I also found the Daleks at the start, pretending to be compliant to the humans; hilarious asking the doctor as he tries to destroy it “would you like some tea”. And using the Doctor for their master plan how surprising and interesting was that (am I being sarcastic or sincere? You be the judge). Now to explain the depressed Dalek and my room-mate, on Thursday I purchased a small Dalek (Laser non-operational of course) and as we sat down to watch the episode (well he was strapped down to stop it trying to beat me to death) it was... upbeat?? Well it was yelling exterminate rather loudly so it seemed okay. However by the end it seemed almost depressed as it tried to now kill its self over its replacement, I’m not quite sure what to do with it.. I’m thinking of showing it the stolen planet, where the Dalek kills to doctor, to cheer it up (better not show it the genocide at the end though).

NEXT TIME

River song is back, and so are the weeping angels, hidden within a myriad of stone statues, will the doctor find it before something terrible happens? Also note that in the trailer there is an image of around five of them in a corridor, is this single angel on a rescue mission?

The Crack is back, I maintain that something this obvious must be a ploy to distract us from something else, could it be the final villain in the first episode Mister Moffat alluded to in a recent interview?? Also the Stolen Earth Reset, how will this play in?

Rating: 8/10

Favourite Quote: “Don’t mess with me sweetheart”

Now I feel bad

2010-04-17T07:35:00.000-07:00

I was browsing the interwebs when I stumbled across a Youtube page for a tuber named Seduff. I quite enjoyed the stuff I'd seen of here before so I was interested to see what she'd been up to (and as a fellow Aussie DW lover I felt patrioticaly abliged).

This is what I found:

I absolutly loved this video, but it reminds me of how great David was and tears me between my love for the DT and my budding romace with MS. Well before I make any value judgements, lets see how MS does with a true Who villian (he hasn't really tackled one yet). Also I've heared that the events of The Stolen Earth and Journey's End will be reset.

God Bless Stephen Moffat (Or Mark Gatsis if it was his idea)

Clip Show: Victory of the Daleks

2010-04-15T07:28:00.000-07:00

The Clips are up for Victory of the Daleks, and they are alot more interesting than previous ones:

So Churchill knows the Doctor from earlier in the war, and he wants the TARDIS key... is this why the doctor is here, why the Dalek's chose not to kill him? The time energy?

Everytime I hear that line I get a chill, 'I am your sooolider'

This hopefully shall be good. I make no promises after last week.

Harry Potter is out to send your children to hell

2010-04-13T22:41:00.000-07:00

I have recently had it brought to my attention by a very reliable, and not at all petty and manipulative, group that Harry Potter is really turning our Children into tiny Hitlers and Demon posessed Blood drinkers, watch below for the shocking proof:

Now for those of you who are curious I have a video below which is the most evil and vile thing to come from this Potter craze.

I cannot in good faith embed it so you will have to follow the link

WARNING: THIS VIDEO IS NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4

Those sick bastards!

Review

2010-04-11T03:03:00.000-07:00

Well well well, here we are, Week 2 and Moffat tries to bring the darkness... with limited results, Amy saves us from the Doctor, and the Smilers are revealed ... and don’t satisfy. But lets jump straight in:

PLOT

Okay, this episode sees us aboard the Starship UK, where things aren’t as they seem (wouldn’t be much of an episode if things were exactly as they seem I suppose), and as one might expect it is up to the Doctor and Amy to get to the bottom of it. So far as plots go, I really felt let down by this one, Early moments with the smilers gave them a real scare appeal as these evil watchers, who are working rouge to bring society down. However one of the aspects I did like was how SM showed that given the option humanity will do terrible things and just simply choose to erase them, it made a good point and was a generally nice touch.

THE DOCTOR AND AMY

Being only the second episode, the relationship between these two is still kind of being explored, but we got to see how the ‘Last of the Time Lords’ idea was presented in this new series. I quite like how Matt Smith played it, choosing to be more distant too it and accepting of it than DT. I also liked the contrast at that point between the Doctor and Amy, they both knew terrible things and while Amy chose to hide from it, the doctor chooses to live on with the knowledge of his past, in order to find other ways of saving everyone. Now the ending, This is the sort of ending that reminds me of Dalek during the Eccleston series, where the Doctor is ready to kill but the Companion (in Dalek, Rose) stops asnd saves the Alien, this time however Amy sees something that the Doctor doesn’t, its nice that Amy seems to be more akin to the Doctor than any other new series companions, but the ending still did feel right... as though there is still something missing to this Doctor

SECONDARY CHARACTERS

The secondary Characters of this episode (Liz 10 (reminds me of the kids show Ben 10) and Mandy) were probably the most paper thin characters that I have seen from SM in his entire Who writing time, from the man who delivered Sally Sparrow and Madame de Pompadour, it hurts to watch these characters flap about on the screen. Mandy, while providing a good comaprrison between the doctor and the Space Whale, wasn’t all that interesting and once we got past Amy getting abducted, she seemed to serve no further purpose. As for Liz 10 I just didn’t find here interesting, although I will admit here line "I'm the bloody Queen, mate. Basically, I rule" was quite awesome, but past that I just didn’t care about her.

ALIEN/ENEMY OF THE WEEK

Enemy:

The Smilers, touted as being one of the better big bads of the new season these guys were pretty pathetic, offering only a minor chill factor, they didn’t really kill anyone or do anything, they were just mere tools of the system, nothing to interesting here.

Alien:

The Space Whale, I liked how this entity was portrayed as the main villain of the piece controlling everything, but turns out to be a doctor like creature (hmm... maybe humanity should have been put as the enemy) But once much like the other characters was completely un-interesting, and a little bit silly

NEXT TIME

Churchill and the Daleks, for a guy who seems so happy with his new best friends, why would Churchill call on the Doctor... something doesn’t ring true here.

FUTURE

As we can see there is a crack, much like the one on Amy’s wall on the side of the ship. Is the crack following the doctor? And if so who is opening them? Is this something to do with the Pandorica? Who the hell knows, but this smells an awful lot of a Bad Wolf scenario.

Clip Show: Beast Below

2010-04-10T01:14:00.001-07:00

A couple of clips were released this week for Beast Below, so I've got them up for you:

(On a more personal note I'm back from my holiday, so the blog is back from hiatus, huzzah!)

Review up tomorrow

Review

2010-04-06T03:24:00.000-07:00

On the 1st of January man Who fans mourned the loss of the Tenth Doctor (Mr Dacid Tennant) and were saddened by the leaving of Russell T. Davis, most of us belived that no one would ever be able to fill their shoes, and on April 3rd... We were proven right, because on that day 2 new men ( an old hand and a fresh face) walked into town, wearing their own set of shoes, while the old shoes were left behind (... I don't think this analogy is working to well any more), and one thing is for certain, nothing will ever be the same

THE OLD HAND

Using all the brilliant episodes of DW written by Mr Moffat that have come before, I still didn't know what to expect. Could he make an episode that was quick witted and interesting, and still maintain that slightly dark adult edge he'd always given us before? Well the doctor has just regenerated, the TARDIS is rebuilding its self, the Sonic Screwdriver is broken and there is a shape-shifting alien prisoner on the loose... Oh and the world is going to be incinerated in 20 minutes, did I mention that the companion has gone through 12 years of therapy because of the doctor? I loved this episode it had the perfect mix of introdution and story, while we still learnt so much about this new doctor and who all our new characters are, but at the same time we got an interesting story with real enemies and pace. If we can consider this a view as to what is to come, I must say that I'm quite happy.

THE FRESH FACE

Now I know I may have rambled on the teeniest tinyest bit about shoes before, but now I'll explain what I mean, DT left a large shadow that many people though (yes, your reverant blogger included) Matt Smith would only get lost in. But we never even looked at him as the guiy who is replacing David, he was very much his own man, while he's still the mad brilliant Doctor we know and love, he brings just brings an energy to the doctor that gives it a new and different life (I particularilly enjoyed the Custrad fish fingers and how Amy bested him quite a few times). I look forward to seeing what else we learn about this new (Nothing like DT) doctor.

Kiss'O'Gram

So what about miss Pond? Looking at the most reccent set of comanions, everyone has been reliant on the Doctor, and while he may let them down for a moment, he is always quickly back to make things right. But for Amelia Pond, he has always let her down; because of him she was subjected to 12 years of therapy and a futher 2 years of anxiety when he skipped off again. So why did she go with him? He can't really be trusted and you're getting married tomorrow. But he is the man she has dreamed of/ imagined for most of her life. So while I remain unsure of how this thing will develop, I'm sure it'll be interesting to watch.

So How was...

The Story

Cosidering the standard set by RD in the way season openers, this exceeded what I expected, I will admit that it didn't quite have the enemy element of 'Rose" or 'The Christmas Invasion', but it did come across as a mush smarter episode. I also liked the character intorductions, we learnt about the doctor and amy, through their interactions which were generally quite interesting. Another aspect which I did enjoy, and can see becoming a staple of this doctor, was the back-track view, where we searched Rory and Prisoner 0's human form. It was this use of new technology along side the nods to clasic Who that really sold me.

The Sceondary Characters

The secondary character development in this was quite good, while I would say we didn't see the usual range of colourful characters that Moffat's Who episodes have given us, this story had to be more focused on the Doctor and Amy, so it would be hard to introduce more characters. That being said, I did like his introduction of Rory, I found Rory to be very real, noticing the world around him before the doctor even arrives, he isn't like some characters (first season Micky for example) who only seem to do things in relation to what either the doctor has told them to do, or that the doctor is doing.

Alien of the week

Prisoner 0, during the first half an hour I was not impressed by this snarly growly creature, he just seemed to run around anc hase things, no thought at all. However when at the end he started talking and practically taunting the doctor, as thought he knows him, or is part of something bigger, like say... I don't know... THE PANDORICA!!! More on this to come

The other aliens were the Atraxi... I wasn't a big fan of these guys either, they were necessarilly big eyes in snowflake style ships, that look an awful lot like the ones piloted by the empress of the Raknos. For me I would ahve been just as happy if the Judoon had been used, but then again I guess we would have lost the bit at the end where Matt Smith steps through the images of the doctor, which was quite awsome

NEXT TIME...

So what are we up to next week and what could be coming back? Well to address the later question, Prisoner 0 alluded to the Pandorica and silence, now there have been rumours that the Pandorica would be in the finale, so lets assume those confimred, but how does 0 know about it?? I'm not too sure wether this is the last we'll see of 0 (remeber because it took the doctor 2 years to come back with the Tarids 0 could have escaped, been shot, had kids settled down, we just have to remember that stuff could have happened). Now to the next episode, well we have London in space and wierd Smilers in some sort of red room. So thus far it looks good :).

Rating: 7/10

Clip Show

2010-04-01T14:17:00.000-07:00

In preparation for Saturday, I've trawlled through the net and found as many clips from episode one as I could, enjoy the first glimpses of the new doctor (I'm still reserving judgement until I see the full episode, but I do feel better)

Bored in a Lecture

2010-03-31T14:28:00.000-07:00

Yhea, so I was trying to sit through a Philosophy lecture yesterday, and I got kinda bored so...

A small Jedi battle with stick men (I know its geeky, but you have to understand who bored I was)

And one other creation on my behalf

It's a trap

2010-03-29T06:53:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my disection of the latest DW trailer. The trailer to start wiuth, is pretty awsome, but what I wanted to do was have a look through it and note any spoilery things, as well as seeing if we can work out what goes with what episode.

Lets Begin

This image of amy floating out in space could really come from any part, but taking the fact that she's in her dressing gown, I'd put this as either the very end of Episode 1 or start of Episode 2. You can see some of the Tardis from here, the more elegant touch the Moffat promised for sure, but is still retains some 9/10th doctor era look. BREAKING NEWS: The tardis is revealed, check out these pics: Tardis Interior

EPISODE: Beginning of 2

So this image looks of a far distant city, however if you look at the buildings you can see names such as "Yorkshire" and "Surrey", so this is probably the futuristic England talked about in the brief for the Second episode

EPISODE: 2

Okay for a time I thought this was from episode 2... however after looking at a RS pic below, I'll conceed that this is more likley episode 4/5

EPISODE: 4/5

Old fasion phones, kick-ass old british army uniforms, welcome to WWII Doctor who style, this episode is set to bring in some British Darleks, wether they are created by some renagde genius or they decive Churchill is unknown, but its set to be interesting.

Episode: 3

More WWII (The rumor going around about this is that we are back on parallel earth but back in time, two reasons I find this unbelivable, 1. Steven Moffat has way too much integrity to drag this back up, and 2 its definently an older looking london and those look like baloons)

Episode: 3

This space ship looks alot like the one with River Song, plus there is the picture below

I wonder who the other person is?? *cough* River Song *cough*

Episode: 4/5

I had originally thought this would be frome the Angels episode, however a poster on Gallifrey Base (Sudden Impact) suugested this could be from the final. And looking at Riversongs hair colour, back to brown like the Stonehedge pic...

Episode: 12/13

Lets say a big welcome back too THE WEEPING ANGELS!!!

EPISODE: 4/5

This is an awsome looking Dalek, note the British flag

Episode: 3

Roumor mill on the internet is that this is from the final episode, with River Song again.

And the Doctor's new sonic screwdriver, looking alot more alien than before, cool.

Episode: 12/13

Exterior shot of River Song's spaceship, you can't see it but rteportedly it has the words Byzantium on it, which is a reference to some of the adventures that River Song mentioned in the last series

Episode: 4/5

More weeping angels, and the new doctors 'how awsome something that may kill me' face

Episode: 4/5

More interior of the River Song ship

Episode: 4/5

This looks alot like the sort of scenery that wouldn't go astray with the stonehedge stuff, plus with the other c ast of characters we've seen in this style it looks alot like an end game

Episode: 12/13

More oldey times stuff, looks like the TV from Idiots Lantern... so I thought it was the Churchill episode, but people at Gallifrey Base have pointed out to me 1) there weren't many TV's during WWII and 2) there is a Smiler (enemy of episode 2) booth to the left of the shot

Episode: 2

This one, again could come from the series final, however it could also come from the Surilian one, or even the Amy centric one. I hope it is some giant final, where the Big Bad pits some of the greatest enimies of the doctors past against him. Would be interesting

Episode: 12/13

The Doctor... is riding a horse... and looking badass I can't wait to see this episode

Episode: 6 or 12/13

Just a harmless normal space battle right?? Well first off, notice that the massive ship is like the ones used by the Daleks, also those smaller ships look an awful lot like WWII Planes (Spitfire Fighters I'm told by Khai JB from io9.com)...

Episode: 3

Crazy (non-Sparkly) Vampires in Italy, we must now all pray this dosen't go anywhere near twilight.

Episode: 6

I love the Atmosphere of this episode, Amy is once again in her dressing gown

Episode: 2

New villains known as the smilers, they look like the kind of scary that we have come to expect from Moffat, but another trademark of Moffat is that there will be more than meets the eye

Episode: 2

This appears to be the only direct refference to the Sirulian episode. See the green pincary thing in the background?

Well this is what it was attached to

Episode: 8/9

Funny clothes... Generally awsome looking beard... this could very easily be mr Vincent Van Gough. Where's the yellow monster?

Episode: 10

Okay... I've got no idea about this... it could be the episode with Amy's crazy pregant dream but thats really just speculation on my part. UPDATE, I've just had it pointed out to me that Amy is in her night gown so it's more likley to be episode 2

Episode: 2

In the section that was put up from the episode in Venice the wierd vampire gilrs refered to the Stewerd.. Could this be the mysterious person??

Episode: 6

River Song is floating into space... this could call for some explanation

Alot of explanation

Episode: 4/5

One of the best things about Doctor Who trailers is the Doctor jumping from an explosion.. Reminds me of season 3's Lazarus episode

Episode: 6

This is one of my favourite clips from the trailer, it could either be the Angels episode or the final.

Episode: 4/5

Metal cable attacking Amy in the same place we saw the Cyberman with one arm (or maybe one arm of different capibilities??)

Episode: 12/13

Doctor Who returns to Australian Screens on the 18th of April, I'll have a review going up before each episode. Thanks to my UK correpondant (will be named in the first post)

Story Time: True Easter

2010-03-28T05:49:00.000-07:00

So easter is a week away, and I found myself standing behind my counter at work as 2 small children were hanging off their father screaming about how they wanted easter eggs. The dad, trying to be diplomaic, said they'd have to wait until the rabbit came next week.
Now would you look at that, rabbits and eggs... Does that even make sense? However it was one last thing that was said by the kids that really intigued me. "Daddy, where does the Easter Bunny live?". He had no answer.

I now feel it is my deuty to give parents and people, the appropriate story of eater, here it is warts and all:

Once upon a time in the far away Holidayland, a place where all holiday creatures live in harmony, for example santa is playing tennis with Larry the Leprechaun and all of them get together on Friday night for Kareoke (For such a small guy Cupid still manages to drink everyone under the table)... Now what was I talking about...

Ah yes thats right, anyway so it was a long time ago and there were these two rival fraternities who were trying to move up in the world. One group was the Chocolatiers, yellow chickens who use full body robotic suits to mold chocolate into images of beauty, from full sculptures to a fountain made of white chocolate filled with dark melted, they worked under Santa, but had also done some favours for Cupid. Then there was another group, know only as the rabbits they acted as muscle for some holidays, moving stuff and even building things when the time called for it. Most holidays used them as back-up if they failed to do something, mostly because of their near in-exhaustable number. However the rabbits had never proven too reliable, as they often went to follow leads that achived their own ends.

After months of heated debate the higher powers of the Holidays decided that the Chocolatiers would begin their holiday to coincide with the death of Christ. So excited by the event the Hens made a giant golden chocolate egg, to be the symbol of the holiday. So on next Saint Pat's day, as the Leparachauns roamed the earth, drinking with the inhabitance and image was settled amongst the minds of the people of a giant golden egg, given on the day of Christs death. And soon enough the time came around and earths people centers were filled with these beautiful golden chocolate eggs, only one per every hundred people (as the hens didn't have the manpower to give some to everyone) exciting the masses and begining the first easter

To say the rabbits didn't take this rejection well would be an understatement, you see... well... they quit all current jobs and started to build something, but no one knew what it was.

In November after the first Easter the Rabbits made their move, and into the new easter area of the Holidayland rolled a giant weponised rabbit carrying carrot. The hens never stood a chance, the rabbits ran straight through the town destroying everything that stood in their path, and taking as many hens as they could prisoner.

It was this event that created the easter that we now know. As chocolate efigies of these rabbits can be seen popping up more and more in shops, the leader of the group, a mysterious enigma known only as 'the bunny' has been taken on as the symbol of the season. No matter how mauch the Holiday leaders want it to all go back, the new image of the Easter is burned too brightly into everyones minds that it will never leave. But still the Hens fight back, continuing to make small tributes to their once great egg, they defy what the rabbits want us to see, to remind all humanity of what easter, for one year, was.

Okay so thats my Rambling of the Sunday, now this won't be the last time I take on the events of Holidayland, or any of the other lands that live adjacent to our own, just keep your eyes peeled for more stories.

Pop Culture Shock

2010-03-26T18:08:00.000-07:00

What do you get if you cross a film, with a comic book, a video game, and the 1960's Batman show?

This:

This is the first trailer of Edgar Wright's (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Spaced) new movie based on the Scott Pilgim Comic series. Now I haven't read the series, but from what I know the comics are basically a mix of pop video game culture. Needless to say I am really excited for this film, it looks like it will be a blast. One thing I particularily liked was the use of the 'KAPOW' and 'ZAM' style hit titles, they managed to make the sort of video game point, while still being non-annoyingly funny.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is out August 13th, be sure to check it out

Intro

2010-03-26T06:12:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a man, this man decided that he would write a blog... The only question that remained was what would he write it on. He spent the next 2 months of his life, searching the areas in his closet and under his bed he came up with an idea, a weird and wonderful idea, that he would write on everything and nothing, all that is and all that isn't. I guess you might be thinking that I'm attempting to rip off Seinfeld, I'm not, this blog will just have no pourpose, or any direction. It's just rambling, like it or not